The Gordon's

Bieber Fever

2012-02-08T09:59:00.000-08:00

Two weekends ago we got free HBO from our satillite provider. When that happens I go through and DVR any movies we haven't seen to watch at our convience. One of them that I chose this time was Justin Bieber's "Never Say Never." Up until this point I haven't known much about the kid besides his annoying hair flipping tendencies. Chris and I watched the movie and were really impressed with his talent and love for people. After watch his movie I just fell in love with the little cutie. I mean who doesn't love a 16 year old boy who still loves on his momma, grandma and other adults in his life without embarrassment despite vast amounts of fame and attention?
Anyway, the next day I went on iTunes to purchase his album. I was listening to it and singing along with Baby, Baby. It only took one time and Tucker was also coming down with Bieber Fever! He LOVES Baby, Baby and a few other songs on Justin's cd. He asks repeatedly throughout the day for Baby, Baby and he sings the chorus so sweetly. The way he hold "mine" out at the end of the chorus just makes me smile every time. He also really likes "Ennie-Meanie." I realize this exposure to pop music will make some of my music snob friends chringe, but it's stinkin' cute!
I am loving watching his preferences develop and being able to communicate what he wants. Its such a fun phase, that apparently will have Bieber as a part of the soundtrack.

Room to Roam

2012-02-06T08:02:00.000-08:00

We moved Tucker to a twin bed in October kind of on accident. We happened to go to Tulsa for a few days just to get away and he slept in a normal bed at our hotel so we tried it when we got home. It was a miracle for us because he began to sleep all night for the first time in his life! This glory lasted all of two months. In December we went on a two week ski trip with my family and then slept in various other beds over the holidays. Since then he has decided he'd much rather sleep in the middle. This equals little room for his parents on the edges of our queen sized bed. We have adapted because you get to a certain point and it doesn't matter if your all that comfortable you just must sleep. He starts out in his bed every night and makes it until 3-4 a.m. and then he comes to my side of the bed and says, "hi momma. hey. hey momma. hi." until I reach over and pull him up and over my body to his spot. We have tried getting back up and taking him back to his bed. He then reappears a hour or two later. This week we've just been letting him fall to sleep in our bed and then taking him back to his own.
This morning however, Chris had to go open the church up for some ladies who are working out there at 5:30 a.m. At this point last night Tucker was laying with his head towards the foot of our bed and about half on top of me (as usual, I seem to be his very favorite pillow.) So I had Chris move him back to his bed and it left me and our dog alone. It was fabulous. I rolled over and stretched out. Such luxury! Chris and I have been talking about upgrading to a king size but this morning I told him maybe I'd just keep the old one just for me. Man it was nice to stretch out and not have anyone snoring or on top of me or making me hot or kicking me or anything else.
I've always loved my bed, but now that the space is so limited when I have it all to myself I love it all the more!

The Itch

2012-01-26T09:14:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been thinking and praying a lot about baby #2... how they will enter our family? Are we ready for another baby? When is the right time to begin perusing that addition? Should we do any infertility treatments or just go immediately back to DPAS? Lots of thoughts. The planner in me really does best when those things are kind of lined out. I've always known I wanted my children close in age (probably because my closest sister is just 17 months younger then me) so I've kinda thought when the oldest was two I'd like the second one to come. Tucker will be two in April. Adoption is so different because you literally have NO idea how long the process will take. Tucker took three weeks start to finish. Right now we are leaning more toward adopting again. I have known since Tucker was just days old that I wanted to adopt again. Partly because I want him to have someone in our family who he can relate to and match, but also because of the passion that adoption has become in my life and heart. While infertility treatments are certainly an option they are expensive and emotionally rough. We just don't have a peace about going down that road right now. Who knows what the future will hold though.

I woke up early this morning with my head and heart still full of my dream. I RARELY remember my dreams anymore, maybe because I don't sleep in long enough successions to be coherent enough to remember. Who knows? Anyways. In my dream we had just gotten home from Africa (we're going in late July) and we got a call from DPAS saying there was a birth family who wanted to meet us. The couple had several children already and just couldn't afford another. She was already born, but just a few days old. We walked into DPAS offices and were greeted by Sandy. She gave us a super cute diaper bag with one tiny diaper in it and we kept walking into an area of the DPAS offices that we'd never been in before (and actually doesn't exist). I was met there by Dierdra, the Director and Tucker's birth mom's case worker, holding a infant seat with a beautiful, brown, baby girl in it. She told me the birth family was in the building so to stay put, but that I could hold her. Chris disappeared at this point to go do paper work or something. So just Tucker, Dierdra and I were left in the room with the baby. I held that sweet baby girl and tried to remind myself that nothing was decided for sure and not to let myself get too attached, but already felt my heart bonding with this baby. She then peed through her clothes and blanket. Dierdra left to go find her something new to wear and I tried to soothe this naked girl with just a towel to wrap around her. I got her calmed down and was sitting in a chair talking to Tucker about her and letting him love her when the birth family walked in behind me. I didn't know they were there for a while. Tuck and I talked and rocked and sang to this sweet baby as they watched. I finally turned to see tears rolling down this birth mom's face and mine immediately matched hers. She told me they'd been calling her Rosie, which I remember thinking was weird because she was brown, not all pink like white babies. We shared a few minutes and the name we had picked out and then we left with a baby girl.

It just made me anxious for the day when we see the plan God already has worked out for Baby G #2. With Tucker's story and all the details that lined up so perfectly so that he would be ours I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that God already has a specific baby and birth family chosen for us. I know that His sovereignty is greater then my plans and my ability to prepare for what's next. And I'm so thankful for that.

Here's to Baby #2! Maybe it will be fast and smooth just like our first adoption journey was.

Side note: If you're in OKC, Norman or Edmond today to go and eat a Johnnie's and mention DPAS. Johnnie's is donating part of their proceeds to our wonderful agency today.

Random Facts

2012-01-07T12:18:00.000-08:00

Attempt #1 at potty training was NOT a success! After five full days of no diapers, except for sleeping, we decided he's just not getting it. Tucker is still young and we just wanted to try. He did use the bathroom several times and is holding it longer so he did learn something. We'll try again in a month or two.
Tonight and tomorrow we are hosting the missionaries I lived with in Zambia, Africa during college. I haven't seen them since I left Mazabuka in 2004. I'm so excited to see them and to lead a trip of students and adults from our church back to Zambia in July.
My college roommates and I are having a reunion in February in... NEW YORK CITY!!! I'm so excited. No kids. No husbands. Just us girls and the big city! I can't wait to spend nearly a week with these girls and explore a city I've always wanted to go to.
Tucker is talking up a storm! He says almost anything and means what he says. It's so fun/funny to hear him. I just don't think it gets much cuter.
Tuck is also not sleeping again. He slept with us for the three weeks we were gone for the holidays and is not liking sleeping alone. This is making for long nights again and super sleepy parents. No good for Tucker or his parents!
On a much more serious note, We lost our first student this week. One of our senior girls died in her sleep Wednesday night. We are walking through this first in our ministry with caution and sad hearts. I don't really have words for this yet. It has been amazing to watch our community and our church respond to this family's needs. It's also made me so proud to watch how my sweet husband has handled this tragedy and loved on so many people. I'm lucky to have him!

Lunch with Tris

2012-01-07T12:01:00.000-08:00

On our way back to Sayre after all our Christmas fun we got to have lunch with one of my best friends from college. It's been way too long since we've seen him! It was so good to sit and chat and enjoy Tucker's Onion Burgers with Tristan.

Here we are in the good old days at OBU. This was probably 2003. We were such babies! But college wouldn't have been the same without this precious friend!

After lunch at Tucker's we had to snap a few pics with sign!

This guy really enjoyed his grilled cheese and "fwies."

Christmas Crawl 2011

2012-01-07T11:54:00.000-08:00

We have a LOT of Christmases every year. Because both sets of our parents are divorced we always have a record number of holiday gatherings to attend. This year we started on Christmas Eve Eve with two, one on Christmas Eve, two on Christmas Day, one the day after Christmas and then we finished up on New Years Eve. I didn't take pictures at all of these Christmases because my sister did and I don't have those pictures yet. But here are a few of the highlights.

This is Christmas Morning. Papa Bill (my grandpa) helped Tucker go through his stocking from my mom. He just woke up for real and wasn't quite sure what was going on or what he was supposed to do. But they look so cute together! My whole life my grandparents have been at our house for Christmas morning. They are two of the most precious people I know and I'm so blessed to have them!

We started a new tradition this year and left all the wrapping paper in the floor for the kids to play in. This was the highlight of Tucker's entire Christmas this year. He LOVED it!

We all went to church as a family at my home church. This is the best I could get of both kids after church on the stage at Union Hill in Purcell.

Here's the whole family at church. This was the first time in a LONG time we've all been to church together. It was a special day, especially for my Nana Lue.

That night we headed to Chris's Mom's house. Tucker is the only grandchild on that side so he was the star of the show. Di Di lives in Yukon so after dinner and gifts we went to look at the lights there. They are so good! Tucker LOVED them and kept say "Wow" over and over.

The next day we head to Bristow to Tucker's Great Great Grandma's house. Grandma Smith is 99 years old and still living at home. It's always a sweet time to see her. She isn't doing to good this year, but apologized several times for not having a strawberry pie made for me. Unbelievable!

I also realized before Christmas I didn't have hardly any pictures of Tucker with his Uncle Delton so I tried really hard to get a good shot of them together. It wasn't very successful, as most photo ops are these days. But I caught this one of both of them laughing and I love it! His uncle loves him so much and they had a good time wrestling and playing in the floor together.

All those Christmases are hard on a boy! He was so tired he actually slept in his car seat. This is a SUPER rare event in our lives.

Hope every one else's Christmas was filled with as much love and family as our was!

Steamboat Springs Ski Trip

2012-01-07T11:33:00.000-08:00

I've got to play blog catch up because Tucker and I were gone for almost three solid weeks, including Christmas. It was a whirlwind and we're still paying for it with our sleep schedule, but it was all for good reasons.

This year for Christmas my family decided to take a ski trip. Tucker and I went for two weeks and Chris came up for the second week. It was a fun trip, but wasn't without "Bumps" in the road. We left Friday night and the rest of the group stopped in Sayre to pick up Tuck and I. We made it about one hour west when my sisters super-lush conversion van broke down. We spent the rest of the night (until 5 am) trying to get back to our house. The transmission went out so began a days worth of options for alternate plans/transportation. Saturday night about 8 o'clock we left Sayre again and made it all the way in a borrowed Expedition. Thank goodness for good friends!

This trip was also special because it's the first one that both my mom and dad have been on together in 17 years. My baby sister doesn't ever remember them taking a vacation together and so it was extra special. This is such a blessing for a kid with divorced parents to get to experience again. I know not everyone's parents can still get along well enough to spend a week together. It was great for ALL of us to be together. I really loved watching my Dad play with Tucker and Emrie. Special times for sure.

Tucker wasn't super crazy about the snow. When he was so bundled up he couldn't walk well and definitely couldn't get up when he fell down or tripped. But he still looked pretty cute. He did love snowballs and would've been content for me to make snowballs for him to throw all day.

Emrie gave skiing a try this year and she did really well. She loved it and wanted to go everyday. Her parents used a harness to help steer her and though she's not always the most graceful of gals she did so good! With her starting at four years old she should be really good by the time she's an adult. It was fun and funny to watch her and her parents navigate this new experience.

Chris decided not to ski this year and that made his vacation much more relaxing! Every time we've been since we've been married he got hurt. So he watched Tucker while I skied and just hung out. Skiing isn't really his idea of a great vacation, but he's so sweet to let me go and enjoy. We also have a deal that I'll quit skiing if he quits golf and so far we're both still getting to do our activity.

Here's the whole group. So lucky to have such a great family and that we all WANT to spend two weeks together. Thankful my parents can put aside their own comfort for their children and grandchildrens benefit. Grateful that my sisters are my best friends and we love spending time together. And so blessed to have a precious baby and niece that play so sweet together. Great memories were made for sure.

Potty Training

2012-01-03T20:39:00.000-08:00

So we started the fated journey of potty training yesterday. Tucker has been showing signs he might be ready to try it lately and he's getting too big for size 6 diapers. I didn't want to use pull ups regularly because I've heard its harder to potty train after that and they're stinking expensive. So we decided to commit to consistency for five days. We didn't have any plans this week so we're giving it a try.

The last two days we've been to the potty every 15-20 minutes. We have a kitchen timer that gets re-set every time we leave the bathroom. It's a good reminder for both of us. But it's a lot harder then I imagined just to sit in the bathroom for most of the day. In fact my booty is sore from sitting on hard plastic most of the day.
I don't know if he's figuring out what's happening or not, but he does say "oh no!" every time he pees in his super cute big boy undies. I mean despite cleaning up his accidents I've smiled most of the day to see his rolly legs and ghetto booty in actual underwear. Love it! We shall see. Three more days at least. If he doesn't get it then we'll take a break and try again in a month or two.

2011 Christmas Letter

2011-12-12T17:31:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS to our wonderful Family & Friends,

We hope this letter find you & your family healthy & happy. We have had a great 2011 full of milestones for Tucker & sweet memories for his parents to treasure. What an adventure!

Chris just began his fourth year as the Student Minister at First Baptist Church in Sayre, Oklahoma. He continues to work with the students here and to fall more in love with what a little longevity in a ministry looks & feels like. FBC Sayre is a huge blessing in our lives & they continue to love us so well. This is the longest Chris has ever been at one church and being able to watch kids grow up & grow into leaders is really fulfilling for him.

My roll at church has changed some in the last 19 months, but I continue to help out when I can. I’m loving teaching Senior girls Sunday School, advising our student leadership team & helping with event planning and preparation throughout the year. Our students in Sayre really are the best kids to work with & we count it a privilege to be entrusted with them. Our church family at Sayre also continues to be a blessing & an example for how to love people & give selflessly.

Tucker is the star of the youth group & is constantly dotted on, played with & spoiled by our students. He definitely has his favorites among the group. It’s funny to watch them all vie for a baby’s fleeting attention. This year’s biggest debate was whose name Tuck would say first & Sawyer Johnston was the winner! She is still gloating, I think. What a blessed little boy he is to get to grow up as the little brother to 50 or so high school, junior high & college students.

Tucker just seems to get more &d more fun as the days go by! We obviously think he is SUPER advanced in everything he does & are relishing watching our sweet baby grow into a kid. His vocabulary is expanding everyday, he knows all of the animal sounds his momma does, what sounds about half the letters in the alphabet make, two handful of songs (motions or words), family members names & even a couple of movie quotes. This year he has fallen love with the movie “Cars.” He regularly requests to watch it by saying, “ka-chow” just like Lightening McQueen. His favorite toys are cars, balls, shape sorter and his Cars tent. Tucker also loves to read books, run or be chased, play outside, watch tv/movies, play on our iPhones or on the the computer & his Momma. His favorite foods are green beans, mac & cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches and any carb. He is still a big boy! At his 18 month check up he weighed just over 33 lbs. (which is off the charts) & was 32 inches tall (60%). As the days go by we continue to marvel at the biggest blessing either of us has ever received. Tucker is just perfect! Sometimes its still hard to wrap our minds around why God chose us to be his family. Humbled is a massive understatement!

My days are filled with chasing, playing with, feeding, changing, wrestling, laughing, teaching & loving Tucker. It’s a tough job somedays, but I have never loved anything more. Motherhood is the most rewarding & challenging thing I have ever done, but I’m overwhelmingly blessed to get to stay home with my sweet boy. I wouldn’t want to miss a second of these days that seem to be passing all too quickly!

Chris has grown into such an incredible father. It is pure joy to watch him love his son. They both light up when they see each other! When Chris takes Tuck into another room I love to listen to them laugh & talk & play. I knew when we were dating that I was not only picking a guy who would be a good husband, but also a fantastic father & he has surpassed all of my expectations. Chris stays busy with church work, student activities & our little family. He does a great job balancing all of those things.

We are looking forward to what 2012 will hold! A few things on the books for the Gordon’s next year are… Chris will begin his third season as the Sayre Eagle High School Boys Golf Coach, Tucker will turn two and Chris & I will be leading a trip of our students to Zambia, Africa in August.

During this time of year we can’t help, but reflect on all of the blessings we have. Our family & friends continue to remain in the number one spot. Thank you for your friendship, love & support! We are truly blessed to be loved so much by so many.

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year,

Chris, McKenzie & Tucker Gordon

Gotcha!

2011-11-03T22:46:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwY-BUJgRhw&feature=youtu.be
Love this song! It makes me cry every. single. time. Through our pregnancy/baby process the Lord provided us several HUGE prayer warriors. One of them sang this song for us at church shortly after Tucker was born. It's beautiful. Tears ran down my cheeks that Sunday morning as I snuggled my newborn and they do tonight as I marvel at how he's grown and learned and changed in 18 short months.

I'm reflecting on those days today because today is the one year anniversary of when Tucker legally became a Gordon. How blessed are we to have him in our family.
Happy Gotcha Day my sweetness!

Big Bed

2011-10-27T06:56:00.000-07:00

So I think I've mentioned on here before that Tucker isn't the best sleeper. He's been a dream child in every other area, but sleeping at night has never been our strong point. Well, last week we went on a mini-vacation to Tulsa. We had a great time catching up with college friends and just being away. I didn't take the pack-n-play so we got a room with two beds and I wasn't sure how sleeping was going to play out. New place. No rocking chair. Big bed. But to our GREAT amazement Tucker LOVED it. He went to sleep on his own (with just his sippy) laying in the dark room at night and for naps. He slept until 5-6 each morning and I'd go lay with him and give him a drink and he'd go right back to sleep. It was awesome!
So we bought a new go-to-sleep book as a prize and when we got home I thought I'd try sleeping in an extra day bed that's always been in his room anyway. And wouldn't ya know it, he loves it too! He has slept in that bed by himself for naps and sleepies all week. I'm just super impressed. He stays in the bed, even after he wakes up he just sits there and plays until we come to get him. I guess he didn't like feeling trapped in his crib or something. We have all slept so good this week and I hope we've turned the sleeping-all-night corner. Crossing our fingers! I think almost 19 months of not sleeping all night is plenty.
We didn't plan on moving him to a big bed yet, but since it's working we're going with it. Now to say that I'm not a little sad that our rocking-to-sleep phase is mostly over would be a lie. I thought that it would be one of those things I got to say good-bye to with one last night of rocking and probably some tears as I let this precious phase grow with this boy who is less of a baby every day, but it just slipped away when I wasn't looking. But I guess trading for reading books and sweet cuddles it a pretty good swap.
I haven't been brave enough to try to get any sleeping pictures of him because I don't want to jinx this sleeping kick he's on. But hopefully I'll have some proof of his latest great accomplishment.

18 Month Letter

2011-10-16T19:06:00.000-07:00

Oh My Tucker,

Somehow I've blinked and you are more of a kid then a baby. You are sweet, adventurous, coordinated, smart, handsome, friendly, kind, independent and just the light of our lives. Every where we go people still strike up conversations with me about how cute/sweet you are. The comment we get most is, "He looks likes he's gonna play football." Which would be fine with us. You do have the thighs for it! You love to climb, read books, sort shapes, play outside, the cat & dog, and play with trucks/cars/anything with wheels. You respond when spoken to. You follow commands. Your learning to help pick up toys. And much to your Momma's pleasure, you are still a Momma's Boy!

You still LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your cousin, Emrie. You can say her name, tackle her, and you run as fast as your little legs can carry you to keep up with her. She's about 50/50 with how much she likes you. You really think she is the greatest thing. You laugh hysterically at her in person or on videos.

Your favorite foods are mac & cheese, green beans, turkey, grapes, biscuits, pancakes, noodles (basically any carb will do!) goldfish and animal crackers. You usually eat pretty good, sometimes REALLY good. You drink lots of milk and some watered down juice everyday.
You are very entertained by the television and if I'm not careful you'll watch as long as I let you. Your favorite thing to watch, by far, is Cars. It's a good thing it's a cute movie because I can just about quote it. You even say, "ca-chow" like Lightening McQueen. It's handy that you like to watch it sometimes, that's for sure.

You are really smart, well I think you are. You know words or actions to Twinkle, Twinkle, Lord's Army, The Moon Song, Happy and Ya Know It, Patty Cake, Old McDonald and Yummy in my Tummy. You know the sounds letters A-E make as well as G, T, W and M. We're working on more of those sounds and recognizing them by site. Sometimes you do that and sometimes you don't so I'm not sure what all you have down. You know LOTS of animal sounds and recognize pictures of them. You know where most of your body parts are located. You help me put your clothes and shoes on every day and are learning some words for your clothing.
You are very busy all the time! It seems like you are always running, climbing or chasing something. You do this thing where you sit on your booty and roll circles using your arms and legs. I can't describe it but it seems pretty coordinated for as young as you are. You can stand on one foot and kick a ball, you throw really well and with both hands. (your Dad hopes your a lefty for sports purposes) You have really good balance and are doing stairs with ease.
We go to the doctor next week for your 18 month check up so I don't know official stats, but last time we went (three weeks ago I think) you weighed 30.14 pounds and were 31.5 inches long. I think you'll be off the charts in the weight category.
My sweet baby, watching you grow and learn is the highlight of my life. You amaze me everyday with a new word or trick. I'm so proud to be your mom and have you show off all you know to anyone who will watch. I love this journey we are on together and I love the place you have permanently taken up in my heart. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm treasuring these moments that I have just you and me. You are my little buddy and helper. You follow me almost everywhere and always want to know what I'm doing. You love to help me in the kitchen with your own pot and spoon. We read, we wrestle, we sing and we snuggle every single day and I'm just trying to soak up all I can! Thank you for making me a momma and for bringing your Daddy and I more joy then we ever thought possible!

Just let me hold you a little longer because I love you more,
Momma

Photo Card

2011-10-13T10:49:00.001-07:00

Silly Streak Chocolate Birthday

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GO POKES GO!

2011-10-09T17:26:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that we are big Oklahoma State fans around here. We love our Cowboys and love going to the games. It's been a fun thing that Chris and I have shared since our very first conversation. Sometimes it seems silly how in to it that we get, but it is one of the few hobbies we have that overlap. Our first anniversary present to each other was season tickets and we've had them two other seasons since. There's just something about being at the game in a sea of orange all hoping for the same outcome. It's kinda like watching a movie in a packed theater, but better!

This Saturday was a special game day. It was Tucker's first OSU game. His parents were way more excited then he was, but still it was going to be fun. We had been planning on coming up for a while. A couple weeks ago Uncle Delton, who works at OSU, called and told his little brother some exciting news. He is in charge of the athletic dorms and has put in lots of overtime so as a thank you the team was honoring him as an Honorary Assistant Coach for the day. He would get to go to the walk-thru practice and team dinner Friday night and then spend Saturday with the team from The Walk till the end of the game. He was pumped and Chris was excited for him too, but also a little jealous. Last Wednesday Delton called and said that he'd get to take a guest and his brother was his first choice. To say my husband was excited would be an understatement. He LOVES OSU. Like passionately loves them. All year round I hear about recruits, stats, scores, stories and any other Cowboy info he can get his hands on. My sisters and Mom had also been planning on coming to the game so Saturday we all headed to Stilly for some good ol' Cowboy football!

Saturday at noon we lined the street between The an Atherton d Boone Pickens Stadium and waited for The Walk to begin. This is a game day tradition at OSU. The band, cheerleaders, pom girls, team, coaches and, of course, Pistol Pete make the trek as fans line the street cheering them on. Chris and Delton walked at the end of the procession with Coach Gundy and as they passed Tucker joined them.

As they walked away I was just struck with pride and thoughts of what being a parent of one of those players would feel like. What it would be like to watch your son set his sights on something that few accomplish and see it through by playing at the collegiate level. We joke often about what if Tucker plays someday and if he would ever be able to play at OSU. It just brought tears to my eyes. And to my sisters too. We get that way sometimes. haha.

Chris got to continue on with the team and eat lunch with recruits, sat in club level seats, tour both Gallagher-Iba and Boone Pickens Stadium. He was in Heaven all day. He met basketball players, media personalities, coaches and even T. Boone himself. He had a great day!

We finally made it to kick-off and 32 seconds into the first quarter Tucker was out! A 2:30 kick-off is right in the middle of nap time. Daddy did come down to see us and make sure he was apart of Tucker's first game.

But as halftime approached so did the rain. We left early and even though we were a little soggy by the time we got to the car we made lots of fun memories.

Chris and I look forward to many more games and many more memories surrounding our Cowboys. I'm so thankful that this will always be something we can enjoy together. It sure was fun to share with our Baby for the first time. Ride 'em Cowboys!!!

Vocab

2011-09-18T20:31:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to make a list for my own sake to remember all that Tucker can say at 17 months old...Identify body parts: He knows where his _______ are.
eyes
mouth
nose
ears
toes
belly button
hair
knee
hands
wiener

Animal Sounds: He knows what _________ says.
cow
snake
fish
bear/tiger/lion/dinosaur
whale
wolf
monkey
dog
duck

Words he says...
Momma
Dada
Thatcher (the dog)
EEE (for Emrie)
Granna
Nana
Mimi
Joe
wow
toes
nose
star
book
O-S-U Cow (he hasn't quite got the boys down at the end)
counts 1-5
go
bye-bye
hi
sippy
doy-doy-doy (were not sure what it means but he says it a LOT)
car

Songs he sings...
Twinkle, Twinkle
Mother Duck
Old McDonald
Patty Cake
If you're happy and ya know it
Itsy Bitsy Spider

He signs...
more
all done
bite

I don't know if this really means he's as smart as we think he is, but we obviously think he's super advanced and great. He's just learning so much right now I wanted to make sure it was documented. I feel like there are more words, but I can't think of them right now. I literally feel like he learns something new every day, if not by the hour. He can say almost anything he wants to, but rarely repeats the new word. For instance, he said dinosaur once tonight in reference to his pajamas, but wouldn't say it again. I'm just loving this stage of exploration and learning. I am truly just in love with my sweet boy!

The next five years...

2011-09-03T12:47:00.000-07:00

Last night Chris took me out on a wonderful date. Some sweet surragate grandparents watched Tucker for us and we tried a restaurant we'd been wanting to go to. (White Dog Hill in Clinton, it was fabulous! Choclate cake to DIE for. Literally die for!) As we sat chatting about our wedding and memories that surrounded that special day I asked Chris if where we are in our life/marriage/family/church is where he thought we'd be five years ago. Neither of us could've foreseen our inability to conceive a child and adopting our first baby. Living in Sayre wasn't on either of our radar. We both pictured somewhere a little larger, like Tulsa or Norman. If you'd told me we were going to move to Texas I'd never have believed you. As we discussed each of these topics the conversation turned to the next five years. Where we would be? If in Sayre, What ministry would look like after eight years in the same church? We have never had longevity in our ministry and thinking about the kids who will be in our youth group by then. Our now eighth graders will be seniors. Kids that were tiny when we moved to Sayre will be teenagers. We both think that we'll still be in ministry in five years and if so, we want to be at FBC Sayre. We truly believe there is no better church/pastor for us on the planet. Family. How many more kids we would have by then? I'd always thought two would be our number, but now that we're halfway there I can't imagine just having one more. I was one of three and have ALWAYS said if we had a third, a fourth would have to follow. But now I don't know. I think so much depends on if we are ever able to get pregnant ourselves. We definiately plan to adopt at least one more time, but if I got pregnant would I want two that way? I don't know. How many kids will our siblings have by then? What will that family dynamic look like?In five years, Tucker will be in school. He will be six years old. I can't even imagine that. He will probably be playing baseball and reading and doing all sorts of big kid things. I don't really like thinking about that. If the next years pass as fast as the first 16 months have, it will be here before I know it. Our waitress told me last night that she heard if you make it to seven years your in the free in clear. I wish that were true! But for both of our parents it was much longer before the called it quits. I think that scares us both a little. The knowledge that after 18 and 27 years two people can just walk away is unsettling. Last night just reminded me that our marriage needs to be a priority. Not just for the next two years, but for the next fifty or so. I truly am married to be my best friend and my perfect counterpart. I can't imagine my life without him as my partner and I wouldn't want to raise babies with anyone else. To say I'm thankful and blessed would be an understatement.

Five Years

2011-09-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

Five years ago today we got all dressed up. He said "I do" and so did I. We had no idea what was coming our way or where we would end up. But five years later... here's the tally.Four houses,Five moves,Four towns,Three dogs,Eight cars,One baby,And we're no worse for the wear. I'm so lucky to be married to my best friend and the person who is my perfect counterpart. I've always said that Chris is more then I even knew to ask God for when I prayed for my husband. I couldn't do life without him and I can't imagine raising babies with anyone else. Christopher, Thanks for continuing to choose me and love me even when I'm unloveable. You are such a blessing to me and Tucker. I love you and I'm unbelievably proud to be your wife. You are an even better Daddy then I knew you would be and watching you fill that roll fills my heart to overflowing. Here's to the next 50 years!

Goals

2011-08-27T16:32:00.000-07:00

Lately I have found myself lacking motivation. Like I seriously don't want to do anything and nothing is getting accomplished. At the end of the day I feel frustrated with myself because I've wasted another day. Sure I play with Tucker and take care of him, but not much else gets done. Every once and a while that'd be ok but on a regular basis its not good for my psyche, my house or my family. So I'm going to make some goals for this fall. Some big ones, some small. But just a list to make me think through some things that I want to accomplish.
#1. We are going to try to potty train next month. Tuck will be 17 months old and while I know he's young I think its worth a try. If it doesn't work we'll wait a month or two and try again. I REALLY want him to have it down by two. I'm really excited about this and the research I'm doing says that toddlers around 18 months are totally capable. Crossing our fingers!
#2. I want to take a shower every MORNING. I do shower every day, but sometimes its at 1 when Tucker's napping or its 5 when Chris gets home because I don't have anything I have to get ready for that day. I think showering earlier and putting actual clothes on instead of sweats will make me want to do more.
#3. Cut down on unneeded money spending. I find at the end of the month I've bought some things that we don't really need. The main area is clothes for Tuck. He doesn't need anything else, but I always seem to find something on sale or a good deal. I need to only buy what he NEEDS.
#4. I want to be more encouraging to Chris. He recently pointed out that I'm most complimentary of him right after we argue. I don't want that to be true. Parenting and marriage are stressful. Sometimes I blow up over little things Chris does because I'm frustrated with Tuck and then I feel bad so I try to compensate by telling him how much I love/appreciate him. I want to tell him those things just because I mean them, not in an attempt to make my emotional outburst seem more acceptable.
#5. I want to go to lunch with students or friends once a week. Its good for Tuck and I to get out of the house and be around other people. I feel like a hermit sometimes because I go days with Chris being the only other adult I see. Small town living doesn't provide us with busy parks, malls or many activities. Sometimes I find myself feeling jealous of bigger city living because there's just more to do. Even we do go to the park or something we are usually the only ones there.
#6. I want to clean out and organize our garage and office. Both have become catch all rooms and that disorganization annoys me but because its out-of-site and out-of-mind its easy to ignore.
#7. With the things I clean out I want to have a garage sale and really get rid of some of our excess.
#8. I want to read a non-baby related book every month. (I'm taking suggestions) I love to read but have a hard time choosing books sometimes. But its good for me to think about something else.
#9. I want to try a new recipe every week. I'm just getting bored with all my go-to recipes that we eat all the time. (Suggestions also welcome here)
#10. I want to start exercising and eating better. Chris and I both need to lose some weight and I need to be the one pushing us to do it. The extra hot summer has kept us inside a lot.
Ok that's ten. That'll give me something to work on. Hopefully the days won't pass as a blur if I have these reminders of things I'd like to do.

Sleepless in Sayre

2011-08-22T09:29:00.000-07:00

When you have a baby you expect sleepless nights. You know those are part of the deal. And we were fine with that. I think I thought that Tucker would continually sleep better and better until he mastered sleeping all night. I was not prepared for him to sleep all night for several months and then stop and want to be awake for 2-4 hours in the middle of the night and then sleep until late morning. This is brutal.
From the time we brought Tucker home he was an ok sleeper. He would wake up, eat and go immediately back to sleep (unless he was sick or cutting teeth) but around the beginning of the summer he started waking up again. And then he wanted to stay awake. That's where our problem is. I HATE staying awake. Some nights I can't. We've tried a million different things.
Crying it out. Doesn't work. We've done that for a week at a time five separate times in his life. He cries for at least a hour and then finally falls asleep but the moment anything changes in our routine he goes back to crying for hours at a time. This is traumatic for all of us and it just doesn't work for us.
I determined before he was even born that I'd always rock him to sleep for the night. Those moments are so precious to me and I know the days he will want to be rocked will pass quickly so I'm soaking them up. Even though a lot of books and websites encourage parents to teach their children to fall asleep independently rocking has worked well of us. It gives me some cuddle time and him some extra security. Its one of those moments of motherhood you dream about and I treasure it!
The only thing that seems to do the trick in the middle of the night is to put Tucker in our bed. This is one of those things we didn't want to start, but when you get so tired you can't hold your own head up it seems like a better idea then it once did. I don't know that any of the three of us rest very well in our queen sized bed, but a little sleep is better then none at all. One perk of this bad habit is getting to wake up next to two sweet boys. Tucker peaks his eyes open at me and then raises up to kiss me with his sweet open mouth and then we stretch and he smiles so sweetly. I think he likes having us at arms reach first thing instead of waking up alone. I guess we'll just see how things go and we may ask for a king sized bed for Christmas. ha!

16 Months Letter

2011-07-19T13:52:00.000-07:00

Tucker Gordon,
You are just growing up so fast! I swear everyday you turn into more of a little boy then my baby. You are so independent and adventurous. I haven't written you a letter in a long time and I just wanted to document all the fun things you're doing these days. You are truly a joy to so many.
You LOVE to be outside, dirt, messes, holes, rocks, grass and sticks as much as any toy you own. Your favorite toys include cars/trucks, balls, books and your Monkeys. You bring us books to read about a million times everyday. I hope you always love books! Brown Bear is still your favorite. You also like a book you have that's full of pictures. Your favorite pages are of trucks and animals.
You like to figure things and people out and still watch new people with a careful eye. When I'm holding you and someone you're not sure about speaks to you you shyly lay your head on my shoulder until they go away. You've figured out that if you pretend to be shy they won't keep pestering you. Its so funny because as soon as they walk away your head pops up and the jabbering continues.
You are SUPER vocal and loud. I don't notice how loud you really are until we are out in public and then it's almost embarrassing sometimes. You can say a lot of words now and your still signing several. You can count to three, say, "wow, wow, wow," say "O-S-U" complete with your guns (Daddy is so proud!) and you know a lot of animal sounds. You are just so smart. I can tell you understand more and more everyday. It's so fun to watch you learn to communicate.
Discipline has come to be part of your world, and as much as you hate it, you really are doing very well! You weren't responding much to spanking your hand so now you visit the time out corner every once and a while and you have learned to stay put until Momma comes to get you. You are usually crying during your time there, but you do stay which is a huge accomplishment. You also look at things you know are off limits and then look at me and shake your head no-no and walk away if I say that's a no-no. Our two hardest lessons right now are not throwing your sippy cup down when you're done drinking and going to sleep on your own. Momma and Daddy failed at sleep training when you were little because it just broke our hearts and you were REALLY stubborn. But we are committed this time and you are doing better everyday. You only cry for about 10 minutes before you go to sleep on your own. In the middle of the night you still cry for closer to a hour, which is AWFUL for all three of us! But I think in a few more nights you'll have it down...I hope.
You walk, run, spin circles, wiggle, dance, shake your booty, jump and crash all on command. You have started coming to get me or your Daddy by the finger and lead us where you want us to play with you. Every time you do it, it just melts our hearts. It's so sweet to feel your little hand wrapped tightly around my finger.
Another favorite thing you're doing is giving lovies. You come and want in our laps and then you nuzzle in and grunt like we do until we hug you tightly. You also freely give kisses, and sometimes you'll do that on command too. But nothing beats you grabbing my face with your fat hands and coming in for the kill! Love those moments.
You LOVE water, but hate your floaty. You want to be free so bad! You do still love your kiddie pool that you can get in and out of all by yourself. Bath time is still a highlight of your day, although you could do without having your hair washed. You're not a huge fan.

You also really like TV/movies these days. Your favorite shows are Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Handy Manny. Your favorite movies are Toy Stories and Cars. I tried to have you watch something else in the car a few weeks ago and you hated it. You cried until I put Cars back in. It's amazing how well you watch those things and how attentive you are. We have to make sure you don't watch too much, but you sure seem to like it!
You have had a haircut about every six weeks since your were five months old. Your last one was number 9 and every time you get one you just look more like a little boy. Last time Aunt Cassie cut around your ears and your neckline and I swear you looked so big!
You weigh 27.13 lbs. Your wearing size 5 diapers and size 18-24 months clothes. Your shoes are size 5 extra wide.
Your favorite foods are fruit and carbs! You love bread and noodles like no ones business. Grapes and bananas are your favorite fruits. Turkey is about the only meat you'll eat plain. You'll eat others if I sneak them in, but not a lot of them. You like green beans and potatoes as far as veggies are concerned. Really anything you can feed yourself you'll at least try. You get so frustrated if there's something we need to feed you, unless is sugary (like ice cream, snowcones or cake) then you'll happily eat if off our spoon.
You are most definitely still a Momma's boy! You also love your Daddy, Granna, Aunt Chelsie & of course Emrie. You guys are such turds to each other to love the other one as much as you do. Em is going through a big kid phase and sometimes you following her around gets on her nerves, but she takes great care of you.
The last week has been really tough. We thought you were going to have a little brother in January, but your Birth Mom had a miscarriage. You have been the light in these dark days. Your smile and sweet gestures have restored my heart. I'm so blessed to get to be your Momma and no matter what happens in the future we already got the best part of your Birth Mom in you. I cannot imagine my life without you. I'm loving getting to spend everyday with you and watch you grow and learn. I'm so proud to be your Momma! I love you so much more then you can understand.
Momma

The Aftermath

2011-07-17T20:40:00.000-07:00

Just to update everyone on what we've learned since my last post... The baby was born at 12:48 a.m. on Wednesday, July 13th. It was a baby boy and he weighed just a few ounces and was about four inches long. K left the hospital around 8:30 that morning. She named the baby Michael Ray. They had a memorial service for him Thursday morning, but we didn't attend to protect K. She had him cremated and hasn't shared if the doctor told her any cause for her to have miscarried. K is acting very detached and says she's ok. Thank you for praying for her. Please continue to do so.
My previous blog post was also in our church newsletter last week because I didn't want to have to tell the story 100 times and I didn't want people to continue finding out over a prolonged period of time. This proved to be both good and bad. Most people have been very sweet and supportive. Most of them say something about God's will/timing because they don't really know what to say. I don't either. But it feels hallow when your heart still aches for what could've been. It's still so hard to understand. My imagination has brought me through every possible scenario and reason and hope that exists. And still part of me doesn't feel justified in these feelings because I wasn't really his Momma yet.
This morning our Pastor asked for people to come to the alter and pray for rain. We have had one inch of rain in Sayre, America since November. Our farmers are feeling it. Record numbers of cattle are selling at the local auction (it went for 23 hours last week). As our faithful church family crowed the alter several people prayed for rain, but a few of their prayers pierced my heart about our lost baby.
One man who has been so faithful to pray for Chris and I through the three and a half years of infertility and adoption #1 said, "...God, we know you create and sustain life..." As tears clouded my eyes for the millionth time this week, I realized that for me that is what is the toughest part of infertility and K's miscarriage. I KNOW that God is capable of creating life inside of me, but He is choosing not to. For whatever reason this has been a struggle in our life for over four years now. I also KNOW that He could have sustained Baby #2's life while K carried Him if He wanted to. It's so hard for me to wrap my mind around these truths and still trust that He knows what is best. Why not me? Why not this baby? Why get us involved so early? I keep telling Chris that if you can't get pregnant you definitely shouldn't have to go through a miscarriage. One or the other, but both seems so unfair.
The second thing that was prayed was from our Pastor. He used our "Tucker Verses" and my heart just broke. "To Him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly more then we can ask, think or imagine to Him be the honor and GLORY forever, and ever AMEN." Eph. 3:20. These were my prayer for our first adoption process and God was so overwhelmingly faithful to this promise. But some how this morning they didn't hold the sweetness they usually do. They made my heart hurt. I know they are true. I've lived their authenticity. Maybe that's why they stung today, because I can't see the fruition of that promise. I'm knee deep in the rough part that will make that promise sweeter. someday.
I don't know if we'll ever know or understand why Tootsie Roll's life was so short or why everything shook down like it did, but we are trying to praise our Father through the valley and trust His goodness and plans for our family. The two sermons today were on love and humility. I pray that through this hardship I grow in love and humility and learn to walk those out better. For Tucker. For Chris. For our future children. But mostly for the glory of my Father.

Let me see your Tootsie Roll...

2011-07-12T18:42:00.000-07:00

Since June 7th, Chris and I have been counting down the days until we could share some big news with everyone in our world. Our Birth Mom was pregnant again and on June 7th asked if we would adopt this baby as well. We were beyond thrilled and a little nervous to have two babies under two. We had told our families and a few close friends and there were also a few people we slipped up in front of that knew were planning to welcome the fourth Gordon close to the first of 2012. My niece, who will be four in August, aptly named the new baby Tootsie Roll until we found out the sex. I have been writing, but not publishing blogs to our little Tootsie Roll and may still publish them someday. It feels too fresh right now, but I do want to have them for memory's sake. Needless to say, everyone was super excited, not only to adopt again, but to have the 5t for that second adoption to be a half sibling of Tucker's.
Today at 1:15 K, our Birth Mom, called and said her water broke and after a long afternoon of phone calls from her and our adoption agency, it was determined that it was amitotic fluid that she was leaking and because she was only 14 weeks along the baby's organs aren't developed enough to sustain its little life. They induced her labor around 5:30 tonight.
We are heartbroken and unsure of how to feel and process. Adoption makes a miscarriage different. We're apart of the puzzle at this point even though had the baby made it full term we would have been a much larger piece. I don't know how to feel, how to grieve. It's also different then if I had miscarried. My heart hurts for K as much as it does for us. She has very little support and people to come along side her and love her through this hardship. We have lots of family and a host of church family members and friends to lean on. She is the one actually have to go through the trauma of the events of today as well as the entire 14 weeks of this pregnancy. She has wrestled with deciding to parent or place, and through that had to recognize a lot of personal inadequacies (both physical and emotional). All of this is a lot of me to process as a (fairly) stable 28 year old married woman, little alone a 21 year old single mom with no family.
Please pray for all of us as we process and heal. Pray for K as she continues to face rough days, both in conjunction with this miscarriage and just how her life is unfolding. Pray for peace that passes understanding and the opportunity for us to share why we have a Hope during such a hard situation. Pray for K's salvation. Pray for the future of our family and clarity on what and when the next addition will be. After preparing our hearts to have another baby so soon we will be seeking the Lord's direction for when and how to pursue Baby #2.

Father's

2011-06-30T14:29:00.000-07:00

I know this is late, but we were at Super Summer last week and on Father's Day. So here's my tribute to three of the men in my life. The three generations of Daddys in my life could not be any more different! But I've learned so many lessons from my Papa, Dad and husband in their own ways.

To say I adore my Papa would be a massive understatement. He is strong, quiet and faithful. He works hard, too hard these days. He loves his family and is a beautiful picture of a servant. He would literally give you the shirt off your back if he thought you needed it. He has been the two and three year olds teacher for more then 30 years at his church. He has been such a constant in my life and for that I'm eturnally grateful. God gave me the best Papa in the world and I'd be willing to argue that fact with anyone who thinks their's is any better.

My Dad and I have not always had a great relationship. He is hard for me to love and I'm hard for him too. But I have learned to be honest, work hard and do what I say I'm going to from my Dad. He may not have been able to love me like I needed him to but he always made sure we had what we needed, even at his expense or comfort. I'm thankful that my Dad and the example he has set for me, both good and bad
God gave my babies the BEST Daddy in the whole world! He continually shows us unconditional love. He takes so much from me without complaining. He is tender and patient with Tucker. He tears up with every kiss from our sweet boy. He reminds me daily of what real love looks like even when I don't show it well. I prayed for my husband for years before I met him and his ability to be a good Dad was amongst my requests but I could not have assembled a better Daddy.

Long Days

2011-06-28T10:30:00.000-07:00

Today is one of those days. A long night has made way into a long day. I'm having to remind myself over and over that the days may be long, but the years are short. I'm trying to have a good attitude and be patient with a clingy, whiney baby but I'm tired and grippy too. Today I'd like to just disappear and sleep and do nothing by myself. Recuperating from a long week at camp is always rough, but with a 14 month old it's near impossible. And Falls Creek is looming next week, so we'll get to do this all over again then. He wants to read the same books over and over. He wants me within his sights at all times. He needs to eat, poop and sleep but needs my assistance in all of those things.
I'm trying to remember what a blessing Tucker is, that motherhood is, but it's hard. I'm trying to remember I asked for this, no begged for it. And most of all I'm trying to be grateful. But today is a long day. already.

But who can look at this face and not smile? Even on minimal sleep and a cling-bot attached to your leg?

Chamber Free

2011-06-08T15:54:00.001-07:00

As of last week I am no longer the Sayre Chamber of Commerce Director! HOORAY!!!
It was just too hard with Tucker and there were a lot of issues with the position. It's a good thing! I get to just be a momma and I couldn't be more excited. I want to add some structure to our life so days don't pass without me doing anything productive as easily.
Some of my stay at home goals are: daily walks, a daily chore list, learn to coupon & continue to help Chris do ministry.

Tucker's excited to be unemployed too!

Answers

2011-06-06T08:20:00.000-07:00

What works for us in disciplining Tucker?
Well that is definitely a work in progress. I'd love to tell you that he's the perfect child and no disciplining is necessary, but we all know that's not true. We started with slapping his hand when he touched things he wasn't supposed to and that worked well for a while. He learned to stay out of plants and stuff like that. But he's tough so I felt like I was having to slap really hard to get his attention after a while. Lately we are using time outs more because it seems to bother him more to be taken out of the action then to be swatted. It's hard to do at home because there's no one else to get in his way, but we're trying to be really strict at home so he will not throw fits in public when he is in trouble. It's hard. I had no idea how soon you really have to jump on this stuff. We are just trying things and keeping what seems to work and leaving the rest. Different days, different things work.

Do we plan to adopt again?
ABSOLUTELY! Adoption has been the biggest blessing and show of God's sovereignty I've ever witnessed. Here's where we are right now. We want more children and fairly soon. We want Tuck and baby #2 to be close in age so we don't want to wait too long. Especially because there are no timelines with infertility or adoption. A little background on our infertility that lead us to adopt Tuck... We never were officially diagnosed with infertility or really told why we weren't conceiving. So we plan to go to a specialist and have tests run to see if there's a way we could have biological children or not. We are really fine either way, I just need to know. The peace of mind that "I could possibly be pregnant this month" every month would be really nice. And if there are some minor things we can try we may do those. We don't want to go as far as IVF or anything like that. All of that being said we want to adopt again no matter what. Depending on how the fertility specialist goes will decide the time line. And I really would love for the next baby we adopt to also be brown so they would have that to bond over as well. I think that is important down the road.

All time favorite picture of Tucker?
This is hard! He's so stinkin' cute! I narrowed it down to top three.

Most recent favorite

At one year old

And as a newborn
It's really hard to look back through all of his pictures and choose because he's changed so much and his personality has developed so much. I love a lot of them for a lot of reasons.

That's what you wanted to know. Keep the questions coming if you have more.

Blog Draught

2011-05-31T22:14:00.000-07:00

I'm in a bit of a blog funk.
There are things going on I could/should write about, but haven't found the motivation.
Tucker is doing all kinds of new things I need to document. (including his one year letter) But yet the words don't seem to want to come at the right time.
So I'm going to end the drought by answering your burning questions. Several of my blog friends have done this and I thought it was fun, so ask away! Just about anything is on the table. Now I know I'm not the most interesting of folks, but ask me something anyway.
Here we go!

Copied Craft

2011-04-11T13:49:00.000-07:00

I went to a Youth Ministry Wives Retreat a couple of weekends ago and we learned how to make these SUPER cute wreaths. So I decided to show you how to make one.

Here's what you'll need: scissors, felt, styrofoam wreath, pins, a sharpie or other felt tip pen and 1" wide ribbon (optional). I used ribbon instead of cutting felt strips because Michael's only had 13 8.5x11 pieces in turquoise. That was just enough to cover my entire wreath (I got the biggest one they had). I spent right at $20 and it's super cute!

First trace circles onto your felt. I used a bolt of ribbon and got 11-12 circles on each sheet of felt.

Cut out the circles.

Measure your ribbon around your wreath and then cut it into strips. Or if you use felt cut them landscape in one inch sections.

Wrap the ribbon around the styrofoam and pin all four corners of ribbon or felt to the wreath.

Fold your circles of felt into fourths.

Stick pin through the corner of your fourth of felt. Crowd them into the styrofoam so that no white or pins are showing. The great thing about working with felt is that it sticks to itself so it's easy to cover holes and pins. (Reminds me of the good old days in Sunday School)

Finished product. I really like it. It turned out less summery then I had expected but I still really like it. I'm definitely going to make another one in gray for the fall. I also may add a bow with extra ribbon late.
Hope you enjoy this! It was super easy and fun to do. I used to be pretty crafty, but I haven't done that in a while so it was fun.

Ree does it again

2011-03-28T11:18:00.000-07:00

Last night I made this Pioneer Woman dish and it was delicious so I thought I'd share it. Easy, handy ingredients, fast and so yummy!

Ingredients
1-¼ pound Ground Chuck
1 can 15-ounces Tomato Sauce
½ teaspoons Salt
Freshly Ground Black Pepper
8 ounces, weight Egg Noodles
½ cups Sour Cream
1-¼ cup Small Curd Cottage Cheese
½ cups Sliced Green Onions (less To Taste)
1 cup Grated Sharp Cheddar Cheese
Preparation Instructions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Brown ground chuck in a large skillet. Drain fat, then add tomato sauce. 1/2 teaspoon salt and plenty of freshly ground black pepper. Stir, then simmer while you prepare the other ingredients.
Cook egg noodles until al dente. Drain and set aside.
In a medium bowl, combine sour cream and cottage cheese. Add plenty of freshly ground black pepper. Add to noodles and stir. Add green onions and stir.
To assemble, add half of the noodles to a baking dish. Top with half the meat mixture, then sprinkle on half the grated cheddar. Repeat with noodles, meat, then a final layer of cheese. Bake for 20 minutes, or until all cheese is melted.
Serve with crusty French bread.

ENJOY! We sure did!

The CALL

2011-03-24T12:29:00.000-07:00

One year ago today I got up early to help Chris at the golf course with the Sayre Tournament. It was cold and windy. We went to the golf course and after they got started I headed to Elk City for a Wal-Mart and grocery run. I got back into town and as I unloaded the car my phone rang. It was our adoption agency calling to set up our Home Study. I was excited to get that day planned. I got everything put away and then went back to the golf course to see how things were going as the tournament came to a close. I was sitting in a pavilion surrounded by 100-ish high school golfers and their coaches. My phone rang with the DPAS number. I thought Holly had forgotten to tell me something or needed to reschedule or something. I answered as I pushed my way out of the pavilion, but it wasn't Holly it was Dierdra. I struggled to hear her say, "I have someone here who has some really good news for you..." I continued walking further from the crowd as I began to sob because I knew what was coming.
Our Birth Mom, K, got on the phone and told me she was pregnant with a baby boy who was due April 20th and that she had chosen Chris and I to parent him. I couldn't believe it! I couldn't breath or think straight. I fought back through the boys and grabbed Chris so K could tell him the news. He was as shocked as I was. We cried and I eagerly waited for the golf tournament to be over. I remember setting in the car with tears still streaming down my cheeks as I tried to absorb what had just happened. The next three weeks were such a blur... When we got home we call our families. At church we told our students and church family. The next days were filled with registering, painting, showers, cleaning, packing, crying, laughing, shopping and very little sleep. We met K on Saturday, the next Thursday I got to go to a doctors appointment with K, that Friday I went back to Lawton for an ultrasound, the next Thursday I painted the nursery, and the next Thursday we were on our way to go to K's last doctors appointment and got the call that she was in labor. Sixteen hours later our baby boy was born.
March 24th wasn't his birth day, but it will always be such a special day for our family. This year Tucker has a viral infection and has been battling an upset tummy since Tuesday. But as I've cuddled him today I've been overwhelmed with how much difference a year can make. How did I ever live without him? Thank you Lord for March 24th 2010. It's a memory I'll treasure forever.

My Momma

2011-03-23T09:57:00.001-07:00

Today is my Momma's birthday. She is everything I hope to be as a mother. She has lived her life in such a way that she has taught her daughters how to love people, give of themselves, value family and be true to themselves. I know everyone thinks their mom is the best, but my mom is the best for me.
As I've grown up our roles have changed and adapted. She is now one of my best friends. She is the first person I call if I need parenting advice. She is quick to help me see the other side of disagreements. I love to hang out with her. We got to go shopping last week and all day I just was overwhelmed with how blessed my life has been to get to be walked out beside hers. She sacrifices her own needs or wants for those of her children, even though we are all grown now. She is honest. She loves people. She is successful. People just like to be around my mom and that makes me proud to call her mine. Even if it's 2 am I know I can call her and she'll be there. She has been known to get in the car late and night and drive 2.5 hours because I needed her. She just fixes things and takes care of things like no one else I know. Last time she came to my house, she not only kept my sick baby she deep cleaned my house from top to bottom!
My Momma has turned into the very greatest Granna. She LOVES her grandbabies so passionately. She drops her life to spend time with them and adapts her schedule if they are sick or just need to be babysat. She has quwerky things that are just theirs that she says and does. She calls just to talk to Tucker sometimes. When we started the adoption process she was so supportive and knew we'd have a baby by April. Sure enough we did.
My Mom has always been my biggest supporter and most faithful companion. When I decided I wanted to go to Africa by myself for a summer when I was 21 she did all she could to get me there. When I said I wanted to go to OBU she worked hard and sacrificed so much and paid for half of my school so I wouldn't have loans. When I walked down the aisle she was beside me. When I showed her my son for the first time she cried with me. When I jumped off a bridge in Africa I cried because I knew she would've loved to have that experience.
So much of what I am is because of who she is. I cannot imagine the person I would be or where I would've ended up were it not for my maternal compass.

To Grandma's House We Go

2011-03-21T08:16:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we headed to Bristow with Chris' Mom, Diana, and his brother, Delton, to visit Tucker's Great-Great Grandma Smith. She is 98 years old and one of the sweetest women on the plant. She loves her family and has set quite a legacy for all of us to follow. We don't get to see her often, but it's such a blessing when we do.

Four Generations (Diana's Mom would've made five, but she passed away when Diana was pregnant with Chris)

Swinging on Grandma's front porch. Tucker LOVED the swing. We sat out there for at least an hour and he never made a move. This is unheard of these days!

Great Aunt Betty

Great Aunt Janie

Exploring Grandma's house with Uncle Delton.
We had a great day visiting and it was so good to see Grandma. I love going back to Bristow with Chris because it's such a nostalgic place for him. He just rattles off memories and stories from his childhood of people who have gone on to be with the Lord. Just a sweet time!

11 Months

2011-03-16T17:51:00.000-07:00

Tuck,
I've been putting this letter off all day because I know how close to your first birthday we are getting, even though I'm not sure how it happened. Your presence in my life has not only been a joy, but a transformation of my heart in ways I had only heard of before your arrival. I had no idea how fiercely protective I could be until the first time some old lady in Sam's gave us a weird look when you were just tiny. I had no idea how my heart could ache until I had to leave you for eleven days in December. I had no idea how much pride I could have over small accomplishments until you started learning new tricks. I had no idea how much I could love until I held you in my arms for the first time eleven months ago. It doesn't sound like a long time and it feels like it's just flown by, but you have truly transformed me. I love you so completely little boy! You light up my life and my everyday.
You weigh right at 26 lbs. and seem to be holding a lot closer to steady in the weight category. I'm not sure how tall you are, but I think you're growing up. You are wearing 12-18 months clothes, a few of your pajamas are bigger but for the most part you're right on track in size. You are eating real food and baby food. You do a great job picking up your own food and haven't found anything you won't eat. You love turkey and cheese, yogurt, bread, pasta, and gerber cheetoes. We have started trying to get you to drink formula out of a sippy cup to prepare you for what's soon to come. You also drink one-two sippys a day of watered down juice. You handle the sippy really well.

Tooth #3 broke through your top gum this month and I think #4 isn't going to be far behind. I think this one hurt you more because you were way fussier with this tooth. You also ran a low fever and got bronchiolitis again this month. I don't know if its the changing weather or the new teeth or what, but you were pitiful for a couple of days. You had to have breathing treatments and you took them so sweetly.

You have learned LOTS of new tricks this month. The biggest of these is you started walking. For real walking. You are a very busy fella these days and watching you take those first wobbly steps was super exciting. Watching you realize you could make it from one person or object to the other was so cute. You could see the wheels in your head turning. You also started clapping your hands/patty caking. Throwing it in the pan is your favorite part and you usually get to that part early. You can also growl like a bear, hold both hands up signaling "touchdown," give kisses on purpose, point with your pointer finger, raise your foot to get onto something and crawl up & down stairs. You just amazes us everyday. But maybe my favorite thing is your dance moves. You are hilarious! You sway back and forth, bounce up and down and when you get really into it you swing your arms back and forth. SO CUTE! We're teaching you to say how old you are (gonna be). You already do it when we show you. You're SUPER smart!

You can now say bye-bye. But few other new words. Dada remains your favorite. When I say, "Can you say Momma?" You always respond with Dada. Little turkey! You "sing" along with songs sometimes and really seem to enjoy music. You are very vocal and you can tell you know what you're saying even if no one else does.

You are all that is boy! The weather has been so nice lately and we've started spending time outside. You LOVE grass, rocks and dirt. You are content to just sit and dig. You also prefer walking in the grass to the sidewalk. You take a couple of steps and then take a seat to investigate the grass or leaves under your feet. It's been so fun to watch you love being outside.

We are getting ready for your big first birthday! Even though it breaks my heart a little that it is a reality. You are just not a baby anymore. I treasure the end of the day when I get to cuddle with you as I rock you to sleep. You are so busy these days the only time you want to be held is when you're eating or going to sleep. I might rock you a little longer then necessary just feeling you breath and your weight against my chest. You have the sweetest disposition and are so friendly and laid back. People are always amazed at how easy you are.

My Lovie, you are just more then I knew to pray for in so many ways. The Lord continues to give us "immeasurably more then we could think, ask or imagine." Thank you for making me a mother and for giving my life such purpose. I just feel so blessed to get to watch you grow and to be apart of your life. People always say things about us being a blessing to you, but I feel totally opposite. The immesaurable blessing of getting to parent you is more then we could ever give you! I love you so much I don't know how my heart holds it all.

Momma

Baby Steps

2011-03-02T17:20:00.000-08:00

*When I started working on Tucker's 11 mo. post I found this I had never published. It's from three weeks ago!

Our lives are all marked with steps and transitions and milestones. Some are huge steps, but most of the time baby steps come first. In my life baby steps are extremely evident in retrospect. Some of those felt like such a big deal on the day I took them, but as the future met me I realized that those steps had been part of my preparation.
Becoming a mother was full of steps for me. It started "trying" and that was ok for a while. Then it was frustrating and emotional and just plain hard. Then we added doctors. Not one single part of that adventure was fun. It was more of the same. My poor husband and family bore the wrath when three years worth of continual counting, timing, trying, doctors visits, about 100 other people getting my wish with little effort, tears, tests and negatives continued to be my answer.
But God knew. He knew that I needed to take those steps. He watched me fall and fail for three years. He was there with every negative I received. And He knew all that we were going through would be worth it. He heard my cries of anger and hurt.
When you go through the adoption process there are a LOT of steps. Paperwork, classes, interviews, paperwork, waiting, paperwork, background checks, paperwork, profile books, home studies and did I mention paperwork? And even after we were matched more baby steps waited. Meeting our birth mom, going to doctors appointments, getting our house and life ready for a baby in three weeks... but boy was he worth it!
All of these steps were necessary for me to get to enjoy watching Tucker take actual baby steps. He can walk! On February 11th he took his first step and since then has been taking a couple of steps at a time before he falls. He wasn't so sure about it. But Sunday night (Feb. 27th) he started really letting go and taking 10-15 steps at a time. Since then he is getting braver every day and walking alone. He is amazing. Watching him walk and feeling the excitement of this accomplishment is overwhelming. Realizing how quickly time is passing with him makes me cry, but also feel overwhelmingly proud. Proud of his accomplishment. Proud to get to witness it. Proud to be his Momma.
As he is learning to walk I'm realizing that Tucker is teaching me some lessons about baby steps and there place in our lives. It hurts sometimes when he falls, but he knows his parents are close by to dust him off and help him up. God the Father plays that same role in our lives. It's amazing how much my perspective of that part of God's character has changed and is understood now that I'm a parent.
I can't believe Tucker is walking! How has ten months passed and I now have a fully mobile baby? I don't know. It just doesn't seem possible. On one hand I'm so excited and love watching him learn this new skill. On the other hand I tear up almost every time because I can't believe he's so big and how fast time is flying. No one tells you when you have a baby that they aren't babies for even a whole year. I guess I always thought I had a year to have a little baby. But that's not the case. It goes quickly and even though I'm trying to absorb everything and keep it as a treasure in my heart, it's hard.
Here is a link to watch those first steps!

Sisters

2011-02-25T20:44:00.000-08:00

I have the most incredible sisters. We have more fun together then I do with anyone else. There's never a dull moment or one that has to be filled with an awkward exchange. It's just easy. We know each other deeply and love the other anyway.
We are also the perfect picture of birth order rules. I'm the oldest and I've always felt protective and done all I could to set a good example. I remember thinking through things in college and asking myself how I would feel when either of my sisters found out what I'd done or how I'd handled a situation. I always wanted them to be proud of me like I was of them. I longed for them to want to do things because I did them, but that never happened. They grew up great all by themselves without a thought about me. And now as I realize that it makes me feel even more grateful for the two girls who grew up in my house with me.
Cassie is the middle in every sense of the word. She is my polar opposite. Where I hesitate, she jumps! She is full of life and lives so much differently then me. I can't make decisions and need people to reassure me. Not her. She's independent and brave. She can do anything she sets her mind to and she doesn't take crap from people. She is hospitable and fun. Everyone always wants to be around her because she is the life of the party. The 17 month gap that separates our age makes it impossible for me to remember life without her. She has always been with me. As young children I was in charge and did all the bossing. But somewhere around junior high or high school those roles changed and she took the reigns. She holds them well.
Then there's the baby. Our Chelsie. She is the perfect blend of her two older sisters and loved insanely by both of them. She is decisive and smart and tough like Cassie. I see so much of Cassie in Chelsie. They have so many qualities I wish I saw in myself. Chels is particular like me. She and I both have a way of doing things that Cassie totally missed out on. She is smart and beautiful and brave. I'm just so stinkin' proud of the woman she is growing into. I'll always remember the day shortly after my 8th birthday when we welcomed the third of our trio. What sweet memories.
As we grow and life changes around us those two have always been the constants in my life. Whether it's a tough time one of us is dealing with or just a fun day of shopping the troops rally. We are a lot and nothing is off the table. I'm so thankful to have these two people in my life who know me in ways no one else can. I'm thankful to get to walk alongside them through this life and watch as they change their worlds for the better. They are my favorites. What would I do or be without them? I don't dare to think about it.

Ten Months...WHAT? (and a little late)

2011-02-16T14:06:00.000-08:00

T-Monster,
I never realized how quickly ten months could pass! I just can't believe it's been that long. Life with you is the greatest joy and challenge of my life, but I wouldn't have it any other way. You made me a Momma and that is the greatest gift I've ever received.
Today is an extra special date because five years ago today your Daddy asked me to be his wife. It was such a great surprise and thinking back on those precious moments make me realize just how special your Daddy is. I think I picked a pretty good one for you! He is so crazy about you and glows at your every accomplishment.

You are SUPER busy these days! You go all the time. And you're fast! I think I've got you fooled and you'll be entertained a while and walk off and before you know it you're right behind me. You're still a big boy, but I can tell your finally slowing down because you're moving so much. I don't know how much you weigh but I'd say your still right around 25 lbs. If we've heard, "Looks like he's gonna play football," Or something football related once, we've heard it 100 times. You're not small! You are wearing 12-18 months in clothes and pj's. Size five diapers still. You still take 4-ish bottles a day. Sometimes more or less depending on what we're doing that day and if you wake up during the night. You are eating a good mixture of table food and baby food. You haven't found much you don't like and as long as I can get you to focus you are pretty easy to feed. We've also started brushing your teeth every night and you love it! It's so funny to watch you.

You pull up on everything, crawl fast and have started getting brave and turning loose of things on your own. You can stand for a while independently, but you don't really like to. You took your first steps this week. One lone step at Nana Lue's on Feb. 11th, but after your step you fell all the way back onto your back. We all over reacted and it scared you a little. And today you took two steps to get from Dad to Thatcher. No surprise that you were after that dog. He is your favorite thing to chase! You say "Sssss" when you're looking for him. He likes you too, even though he pretends to be annoyed by you sometimes.

You say Dada, Sssss, book, shew-wee and poop. No sign of Momma anytime soon, you little stinker! You can sign dog, eat and all done. You play so rough already. It's so funny how much of a boy I can already tell you're going to be. You love to hammer or bang on things and if you can get it apart you take it apart. After you get something apart (whether it's supposed to come apart or not) you always look so proud of yourself.
Granna got you some Praise Baby movies and you really like those. We've been watching them before bed and you sit so still and watch for the full 30 minutes. You love the television and have a pretty long attention span for as young as you are. But you know if it's something for you or something we're watching.
You also have become quite the dancer! It's pretty cute. We have little dance parties in the bathroom so you can watch yourself in the mirror. But you bounce up and down and smile so big. I can't wait to see how your moves develop as you get older.

You got to experience your first two snows this month and we took you out to play for a little while. You were neutral towards it. I think you were kinda confused. Also your snow suit is too short and part of your arms hung out, but you didn't cry. You made your first snow angle!

You are still so flexible and laid back. We haul you all over the place and you just smile sweetly and go with the flow. You haven't had any stranger danger experiences and still will go to anyone who puts their hands out to you. This is usually ok, but sometimes you go when Momma doesn't want you to. Aunt Dayva gave you your first sucker at a ballgame. Momma objected but she did it anyway.

We made Valentines for our families this month. It didn't work out like I planned and you didn't know what to do with that paint. But it was pretty cute. When I'm rocking you to sleep lately you like to sing with me. And by sing I mean squeal. But either way it's super cute. I hope you love music and like to sing like Daddy and I do. Everyone's bet is you'll be the base in our trio. We'll see.
Our family had the privilege of going back to DPAS to speak at an adoption seminar. This was such a blessing for us because we benefited so much from the families who were on our panel (shout out to the Satterfield's!) You did really well and were very sweet. You fell asleep towards the end of the time we were there. We are still so blessed by the ladies at DPAS!
What was life like before you? What did I fill my days with? I'm so glad I can't remember. Tucker Gordon you are a blessing to me every single day. Thank you for teaching me what it is to love someone so much. Thank you for keeping me on my toes and for making me so proud. I am so honored God chose me to be your Momma and you to be my son. I love you more then all the letters in the world could ever express.
Momma

Happy Birthday Momma!

2011-01-20T12:53:00.000-08:00

Birthday Kisses for Momma

Love, Tuck

Nine Whole Months

2011-01-16T19:29:00.000-08:00

My Little Lovie,
As I rocked you to sleep tonight I couldn't help but feel overly blessed and thankful for you. Your presence in our life is such an overwhelming gift! The sovereignty of God still amazes me when I look at you and realize YOU were exactly the baby we were supposed to have and I remember all that God did to put you into our arms at 2:50 am on April 16th. You have changed our lives and you are such a joy to watch as you learn, grow and discover new things.

As far as learning goes... you can now wave bye-bye. You learned this while we watched cars go by outside of Momma's office. You can sign dog, but you don't seem interested in learning any other signs. You still call me and most other things "Dada" but you also definitely know who your Dada is. You refer to Thatcher as "Sss" and since we got home from Bangladesh you love him more then ever. You finally crawl on all fours. You perfected this skill during your eleven days at Granna's. I think having carpet really helped. You also pull up ALL the time and your favorite means of movement is for someone to hold your hands so you can walk. You also stand alone for 15-20 seconds at a time if you're good and distracted by a toy in your hands. It's funny to watch because as soon as you realize you aren't holding on to something you fall back onto your booty. You also shake your head no-no all the time. You started doing this on the floor so you could feel what was under your head, but now you do it a lot and smile so sweetly. I think you're starting to figure out what that means because you are starting to hear that phrase much more often because you're so mobile.
Growing... we go to your nine month check up this week so we don't know your stats exactly, but right before Christmas you weighed a whooping 24.9 lbs! So I imagine you're still somewhere in that neighborhood. Your first tooth also came through while Momma and Daddy were gone. Tooth #2 is coming quickly. I can feel it, but you can't quite see it yet. I was beginning to worry about you getting teeth, but everyone kept telling me the longer it takes you to cut teeth the healthier they'll be. Who knows if that's true or just a wives tale, but you sure took your time with those.

We had your first Christmas this month and it was hectic! We always have a lot of Christmases to attend, but add in the fact that we were packing for seven family get togethers and an eleven day trip overseas, things got a little nuts. The night before we were to embark on our journey from home you woke up running fever and had the worst night of your life. We missed one and half Christmases the next day to take you to the doctor. You had your first ear infection and round of antibiotics.

You were just a pitiful baby! It was the saddest thing. But after a couple rounds of your medicine you got to feeling much better and were a good sport for the rest of the holiday and were almost back to new by the time we had to leave on the 26th. You loved opening presents and playing with new toys.

But as usual your favorite entertainment was your big cousin! She did a pretty good job at keeping us all entertained this year. That girl is a mess, but you LOVE her!
Leaving you was just awful! I didn't know if I was going to be able to do it, but your Daddy really thought us both going was the best thing. I'll never forget having to put you in your carseat at the airport and watching you drive away. Seriously it was so hard. I knew people were praying for me though because I was at least functional the whole trip. I missed you horribly, but we both survived! I have never been more anxious to get home or to see someone! I think I kissed your face raw the first couple days we were home.
You continue to bless our lives and our family in ways we didn't know we were missing out on. You are so funny and a joy to watch. You are still so sweet all of the time and your personality fits right into our family so well. I can't believe you are NINE months old! It seems like just yesterday you were born in some ways and in others I can barely remember life before you were apart of it. You have taught us so much about ourselves, the character and love of God and about what is really important. We love you so much and we're so proud to be your parents! I'm so glad I'm your Momma!
Momma

Inpending Doom

2010-12-20T10:24:00.000-08:00

In six days I have to leave my baby for ELEVEN days!!! Chris and I are going on a Mission Trip to Bangladesh with seven other people from our church. This has been planned since before we knew we were getting Tucker and before I had any idea how hard it would be to leave him. To date he has spent two nights away from me and neither of those were for a full 24 hours. I cry just thinking about walking away from him knowing I won't see him for a small eternity. Seriously it makes me a little sick to my stomach every time I think about it for more then a passing moment.
I keep trying to remind myself that one salvation is more important then those few days with my son that he won't remember, and deep down I believe that. But it's stinkin' hard! We will basically be doing a youth camp while we are in Bangladesh and I know it will be good once we get there.
My goal is just to get on the plane. Just get on the plane. That's what I have to keep telling myself. Just get on the plane...
Who knew leaving my baby would be so hard? He will be fine. He's staying with my mom and has stick instructions not to start walking, say Momma, stand alone or do any other new trick while I'm gone. I just feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest. And I don't leave for six more days! To complicate things a little more we are leaving Wednesday from our house and won't come back between leaving for Bangladesh and Christmas so I have to pack for all three of us for three weeks, all our Christmases (seven to be exact) food and presents, and mentally prepare myself at least a little so I don't make a total fool of myself at the airport. I've never dreaded Christmas like I am this week.
Please pray for me and our team as we go. It's going to be a rough week getting ready and ELEVEN rough days for me to be away from my Tuck.

Finals Week

2010-12-15T07:42:00.000-08:00

Remember when you biggest concern was cramming every last bit of information on ___________ subject into your head. We went without sleep, showering, really even putting clothes on just to feel confident when we walked into the classroom to regurgitate all we had studied. In honor of those days that now seem so trivial as I look back at them here is a list of some of my favorite finals week memories:
- All the late night breakfasts. I so looked forward to those every semester.
- My first finals week when Tristan and I stayed up all night "studying" for German. We had no idea that would be one of many nights we'd spend.
- Dance Party at the Georgia house with the Dief's, Leslie, Christina and Rachael trying to pass on our NM Tradition to the classes below us. I think we just scarred them for life. I don't think it caught on.
- Pancakes! Lots of pancakes and hours at IHOP.
- Inappropriate conversations with people because you were working on so little sleep and things you normally wouldn't say would just coming streaming out of your mouth.
- Every December finals week, we would watch Christmas Vacation on the steps of Raley Chapel under mounds of blankets.
- Jennie David-Sander's aluminum Christmas tree that became the best decoration for personal showers ever!
- Driving to Chickasha to see the lights.
- Staying up late watching a movie with Megan Guinn instead of studying for our psychology final our freshman year and literally running into class without even brushing our teeth because we over slept!Pretty sure I didn't do so well on that one.
I could go on and on remembering and reliving those fun filled days that seemed so stressful at the time.
God bless OBU and the friends, memories and lessons I gained there.

2010 Christmas Letter

2010-12-10T15:20:00.001-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS Dear Family & Friends -
What a wonderful time of year to take time to reflect on the past months & look forward to what lies ahead. 2010 was definitely one for the record books in the Gordon family.
About this time last year Chris & I both felt like we were supposed to pursue adoption as a means to add to our family. It was a beautiful & fast process for us. In February, we attended an initial educational seminar & turned in our huge stack of paperwork, background checks, reference letters & profile book. On March 24th we were at the Sayre Golf Course & Coach Gordon was manning his first tournament. I had taken a call from our agency earlier that day setting up an appointment for our home study & while I was at the course they called back. I assumed they needed to reschedule or something, but when I answered (in the middle for 100+ high school golfers) it was a different person. I muddled my way through the sea of boys & heard, “I’ve got someone here who has some exciting news for you.” I immediately starting bawling because I knew we had been matched with a Birth Mother! Our Birth Mom, K, then introduced herself to me, told me she was having a baby boy & wanted Chris & I to parent him! Time stood still as I tried to form words through my sobs of joy. I don’t know that I managed anything but, “thank you.” I fought my way back to Chris & had her tell him. After the tournament, Chris & I called our families & shared our exciting news. Later that night we got to share with our students that Tucker would be here soon. We sprung into action in the following days. We spent every waking moment of the next three weeks getting a nursery ready & trying to process what was about to take place in our lives.
On April 16th, we were on our way to Lawton to go with K to her doctors appointment when we got a call from her saying she thought she was in labor. We rushed to Lawton & spent the next 16 hours waiting for Tucker. Chris & I had the pleasure of being in the delivery room & I got to be K’s birthing coach. It was the most incredible labor of love I’ve ever witnessed! At 2:50 A.M. we met Tucker William Gordon! Tucker weighed 7 lbs. 15 oz. & was 20 inches long. We fell in love that night in ways we could not have imagined!
Tucker has been the biggest blessing we have ever received! He is a strong, sweet, smart, laid back guy that continues to amaze us on a daily basis. He is EXACTLY the baby we have been praying for & anxiously awaiting for three years worth of trying to conceive. Tuck loves to bang on things, he eats well, goes with the flow & genuinely loves people. He’ll go to anyone & is crawling everywhere. He draws people in & everywhere we go people want to speak to him or touch his hair. We are working on learning sign language & after only a couple of weeks Tucker can already sign, “dog.” His first spoken word was & is “Dada.” His favorite things include: Thatcher (our dog), a stuffed Monkey, his Momma & playing in the floor. Tucker is eight months old & weighs about 24 pounds & is approximately 27 inches long.
Chris is still serving as Youth Minister at First Baptist, Sayre. We had our two year anniversary here & things continue to go well. We had nine students go on overseas mission trips this year & have been blessed to watch students lead out. He is also looking forward to his second golf season for Sayre High School.
In October, I began a new job as the Sayre Chamber of Commerce Director. My job is well suited for me & I continue to get more & more comfortable with my position. Tucker gets to come with me everyday & that has been a tremendous blessing! I still help Chris with the students & they LOVE Tucker. I mean he doesn’t have a chance not to be rotten when he’s constantly surrounded by teenagers who fuss over him.
Thank you to all of you who have loved us & walked through this year with us. We are so blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful friends & family. Thank you for loving our Baby Boy & for accepting him as part of our family. We couldn’t do life without a single one of you in it. We pray your family will have a wonderful Christmas & a happy & safe 2011.

- Love - Chris, McKenzie & Tucker Gordon

2010 Christmas Letter

2010-12-10T15:20:00.000-08:00

Eight Months

2010-12-08T13:32:00.000-08:00

Tucker Gordon,
This month you seem to have become super independent and opinionated. You know what you want and you go after it or let us know if you can't figure out how to get it. You are a busy boy these days! You crawl all over the place, pull up and walk holding our hands, the later is your favorite mode of transportation. You are so strong and still super observant. You like to inspect things and people before you make up your mind about them. You make the funniest expressions while you size things up. You definitely know new people, places and things. It took you a while to warm up to the Christmas tree, but now we can't keep you away from it for long.

You still go through about six bottles a day. And most days you still refuse baby food so we've just started giving you bites of what we are eating. You haven't not eaten anything so far. You do still eat baby food every once and a while but you have to be in the mood for it. We gave you a sippy cup with watered down juice for the first time this month and you love it. I don't know how much you actually drink but you do a good job of getting it in your mouth and holding it by yourself.
You have moved into size five diapers this week! You are so big!!! I think you weigh around 24 pounds. Sometimes you feel heavier. You are so strong and continue to surprise us with how soon you learn new tricks. You have been about two weeks early on everything your whole life. You still wear 6-12 months clothes but some of those are getting snug and short. It won't be long till we have to move you up another size. Everyone thinks you're older then you are because your so big and you have so much hair. You got haircut #3 this month and this time you got your trim in Aunt Cassie's new shower. Pretty funny day, but you did ok considering.

I love this picture because thiS Is a Tucker-face for sure! You always make this face when you are investigating something new. LOVE IT!
One of your favorite things to do is rock/jump depending on the position you're in. On the floor you get up on all fours and rock, if you're in our laps you jump in much the same motion. It's one of my favorite things to watch you do. You always have the cutest expression on your face. You just seem so proud of yourself.
You say "Dada" all the time and everything is "Dada" but we started learning sign language and you can already say "dog." We are working on more, all done, thank you, Momma and bottle. I'm excited for you to pick up on this so we can communicate even better.

You are a jewel most days and everyone that comes into our office fusses over you. You smile sweetly and flirt a little. I love getting to still spend my days with you, even though sometimes the combo of you and work is stressful. Your Daddy is a great help and has been so supportive through this latest transition.

You enjoyed your first Thanksgiving (and I hardly took any pictures) We had lunch with Gammy, Uncle Delton, Aunt Dayva and Uncle Brad. When you got ready for your afternoon nap we headed south to Poppers. You loved on Granny Meyer and the rest of the family that was still around that evening. Friday we spent the day at Granna's with Nana Lue and Papa Bill and the whole rest of the bunch. You still love Emrie a lot! You light up even at her picture.

Another holiday at our house is Bedlam. Momma and Daddy went to the game while you stayed with Granna, unfortunately our Cowboys lost! But you sure looked cute in your orange and black and you watched on TV. We can't wait till you're old enough to enjoy going to games with us. It's one of our favorite things to do as a family.

You also attended your first concert. Shane & Shane were in Elk City and we all three attended. You really seemed to enjoy it (especially the part you slept through) and afterwards you got to meet them and have your picture taken with them. It was a really fun night.

We are getting so excited about Christmas with you. We bought your first toy to unwrap yesterday! You also went on your first Christmas shopping trip with Granna and Momma. You were a TROOPER! We had a long day of shopping and you never complained once. We are so lucky to have such a sweet boy to shop with!
You have just made our lives so complete and full. You are a pleasure to watch grow and learn. Tucker you are truly the most perfect blessing I've ever been given. Merry Christmas Baby boy. I love you!
Momma

7 Months Old

2010-11-16T14:36:00.000-08:00

My Precious Baby Boy,
I can't even put into words the way you make my heart feel and how much I love you. I fall more in love with you every day and it is my honor to watch you grow and learn. It seems like every day you are learning something else or doing another new trick. You are a true joy to your Daddy and I. I can't wait to watch what comes next and how else you'll bless our lives. How lucky we are to be a part of your life and how blessed we are to get to be your parents.
This month has been busy! I think our lives always are, but I don't feel like we've been home much at all in the last month. You are so flexible and sweet. It's a pleasure to show you off to friends and for our family to watch you grow.

The biggest thing that happened this month is you OFFICIALLY became a Gordon! We finalized your adoption this month. We got to go to court and got your birth certificate with your Mom and Dad listed as your parents and with Gordon as your last name. This was something I didn't realize I was anxious about, but I was definitely relived after it was all over. Now every year on November 3rd we will celebrate your Gotcha Day. What a blessing!

We went to Lawton about a week after our finalization to visit your Birth Mom and Half Sister. You had a great time playing with her and we loved getting to spend time with her at a special dinner to celebrate.

You are so big! I don't know how much you weigh, but it's a lot! You are just growing out of control. You have stopped eating baby food. You flat out refuse! I don't know what's going on. We keep trying, but after maybe three bites you decide that's all you want. I'm not sure what we're going to do with you. You wear size 6-12 months in most things, but some of your pants are too tight. You are also filling out size 4 diapers quite nicely.
You had your second hair cut this month. And you looked so handsome! But you were covered in hair so we gave you a little rinse in Aunt Cassie's sink!

You aren't crawling yet, but you can get where ever you wanna go. You roll, scoot backwards and pull your way to whatever you set your mind to. It's always fun to walk back into a room and you are on the other side of the room.
For your first Halloween you were a lion. Someone gave us your super cute costume and you were a pretty good sport. You looked so cute and we spent your first Halloween with Emrie at the Storybook Forest in Edmond.

We also got to go to my five year reunion at OBU. You were so sweet all day and attended your first basketball game, but you pooped out before we got any pictures. You loved on all of my old friends, and were especially glad to see Uncle Luke again.

You also got to spend a lot of time with Shelby and Hannah! They were excited to see you and to love on you for a whole day.

You are truly the joy of our life! We are looking forward to your first holiday season and can't wait to see you cross the next milestones. Thank you for making me a Momma. I tell you every night before I lay you in your bed I'm so glad I'm your Momma and I mean it! You are just my favorite thing!
I love you with all I am.

Momma

When was the Last Time You Left Home to Come Home

2010-11-11T12:49:00.000-08:00

Saturday will be my first time ever attend a homecoming event and it feel like I am coming home. I've been to TONS of Homecoming celebrations: in high school watching friends get crowns and kisses and now I watch our students experience the same thing every year; in college I always attend Harvest Court and other Homecoming events; and I've been to "The Greatest College Homecoming in America" several times as well (at OSU.) But None of these places were MY home. They were either my home at the time or not ever. This weekend is my five year reunion at OBU and that was my home for four of the very happiest years of my life.
I'm excited to go home again. To see old friends and their families. To see how they have grown and changed since college and to show off my precious husband and baby. It's always fun to go back to OBU for Super Summer and reminisce with my husband and share college stories but this will be different because my friends have never been there as I've told the stories.
Tucker and I have been practicing Ka-Rip today and my sappy heart has been getting excited to go back.
Our Welcome Week theme is the title of this post and I remember move in day and not really understanding what it meant. But as I walked off campus four years later I cried because of how true that statement really was in my life.
I'm ready to leave home and come home...again!

It's here!

2010-10-31T09:21:00.000-07:00

The long awaited six months is over and we have been waiting patiently to hear from our lawyer about finalization. It's probably no big deal, nothing is going to go wrong, but it's the last step in Tucker's adoption process. His birth mom signed away her rights April 27th and his birth dad didn't show up to court in May so really there hasn't been any chance of bumps in the road since then, but this still feels a little unnerving. Maybe it feels this way just because court always sounds scary.
We found out Friday that we have a court date! This Wednesday, November 3rd will be Tucker's official Gotcha Day and he will forever and technically be a Gordon. This is so emotional for me to even think about. I mean he's been ours since his very first breath, well really before that, but to know that it's official and NO MATTER WHAT no one can ever fight that is just an awesome feeling that I didn't realize I was missing until this weekend. I remember thinking about this day when he was first born and it just felt so far away, like one of those days you know will happen but you just can't imagine it being here kinda things.
So say a little prayer for our family, our judge, and our lawyer that all will go smoothly and that it will be a beautiful day of celebration and yet another milestone in our sons life.
We will celebrate his Gotcha Day every year and remember the special blessing he is in our lives and to our family. (To all you adoptive mommas: Ideas and fun tradition suggestions are welcomed!)
I can't put this journey we've been on for the past year into words. It's appropriate that it would be this week because one year ago this week we started talking about adoption for the very first time. I can't imagine going down another road and I can't imagine a more perfect child for us.

Transitions & Training

2010-10-21T10:36:00.001-07:00

I started my new job a week ago Monday. Things are going well and I think I'm going to like it, but it has demanded a lot of changes and adjustments in the Gordon house.
We have ALL started getting up at 7:30 and Chris has done a FABULOUS job of taking care of Tucker in the mornings and getting him ready so I can get ready. He has made me going back to work a breeze and I couldn't ask any more of my sweet hubby. I wasn't sure how we would all make this transition but so far, so good. It's the sweetest thing to watch the man you love fall deeper in love with the baby you adore. They make quite the pair and both get so excited to see each other. I really married the very best guy for me! I'm daily reminded of reasons I love him and count my blessings that he is mine.
Due to me having a schedule, this week we have started trying to get Tucker to sleep thru the night. He's done this on and off since he was very small, but it has recently become more of a necessity. Sunday night he slept all night by himself. Monday night we were all up for almost three hours trying to let him cry it out. He won Monday night! I finally caved and gave him a bottle as we rocked back to sleep. Tuesday night was a little better. I felt more prepared for what we were getting into and he only fussed for an hour and a half. But I think he's getting the hang of it. Last night he woke up three times about 30 minutes apart and fussed for a few minutes, but soothed himself back to sleep. I didn't get up and Chris didn't wake up! Hopefully this is the light at the end of the sleepy tunnel. But we're heading to my Mom's tonight for the weekend, so we'll see. She's not one to let him cry... It's been a rough week with little sleep for all three of us. On top of this Tucker has been super fussy and this morning woke up with a snotty nose. I think he might be cutting a tooth. It's either that or he's just worn out from the amount of tears he's had to shed this week.
It's funny how hard routines can be to establish. I function best in that environment, but struggle to get those things going sometimes. The hard work is paying off and in the long run we will all be better off.

Half Birthday Letter

2010-10-16T19:52:00.000-07:00

Tuck -
You are six months old today and everyday your personality is developing. You are such a fun loving baby and you are eager to make new friends. You smile easily, laugh a lot and giggle so sweetly. Your MAJOR development of the month is just yesterday you said your first word. "Dada" won! But either way you reduced both your parents to tears with your first sweet word!
We took you to get weighed and measured October 5th and you weighed 20 lbs. and 9 oz. and you were 26 inches long. We went early this month so that the adoption agency could get everything sent to the lawyer so we can finalize your adoption soon! We go back this Wednesday to get your 6 month shots and an official report.
You have moved into size 6-12 month clothes and you are still wearing size three diapers during the day but we have started putting you in size fours to sleep in.
Lately, you love to be in the floor. I think you will be crawling soon, definitely by Thanksgiving. You love to look at yourself in the mirror after your bath. You just think that baby is so funny!

You also had your first bubble bath this month. I got a little carried away with the vapor bath, but you had fun.

We have also started baby food this month. I made all of it with Granna's blender and saved a bundle. So far sweet potatoes seem to be your favorite.

You officially become a Gordon in the next month! We are so excited to go to court and for it to be FOREVER. I remember thinking of this time in the life of our family when we first brought you home and it felt like so far away, but it has snuck up on us quickly. We don't have an official court date but we know the petition will be filed this Monday and has to be on file for 20-25 days (because of your Native American blood) before we can finalize.
You continue to bless our lives in more ways then we ever thought possible. You are so loved by so many! You get passed around where ever we go and you just love on everyone right back. You are a local celebrity in Sayre and everyone fusses over you. I fall more in love with you every single day! You are such a blessing and I know you have a special purpose to fulfill. Thank you for making your Dada and I a family. We love you more then words can say!
Momma

A Change is Coming

2010-10-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

For a while I've felt like I needed to get a job. Not because Chris has said as much, but because with the speed of our adoption and the immediate need for a bigger car we depleted our savings account and are in the red that I despise so much! So I had began praying that an opportunity would present itself for me to be able to still be a Momma all the time, but would also allow for a little extra income.
About ten days ago a friend from church approached me about the Sayre Chamber of Commerce Director Position. I immediately said no thanks because it was more full-time then I wanted and I didn't think I could have Tucker at work. But she encouraged me to apply, Chris and I talked it over and I decided to throw my hat in the ring - really without knowing for sure if I wanted the job or not.
Well I interviewed last Thursday and I just knew as soon as I left that they were going to offer me the job. And sure enough, Friday afternoon I got a call and I took the job. It's one of those situations where I didn't feel like there was good or bad decision, but it did seem like God's provision.
The job fits my skill set and personality well, I can have Tucker at the office with me all the time, they will be flexible with church stuff, and it's only 9-3 everyday. I will have a lot of creative control and the job is mainly event planning, which is my very favorite thing to do. There's very little downside.
It's good. But it's scary. It's a job I will be invested in. My heart will be involved in a way that it hasn't in my past several positions. But I think that will be a positive. We're going to try it. I also think it will be good for all three of us to be on a more consistent schedule. It's also hard for me to think about losing my free time and easy schedule. I kinda like not having to get ready everyday and I LOVE my sweats.
But all of that is about to change - I start a week from today!

Loyal & True

2010-09-21T10:17:00.000-07:00

We got to take you, Emrie and Aunt Cassie to your first OSU Game Day. This was a big deal because it's one of your Daddy and I's very favorite things to do. We look forward to football season every year and this year we knew was gonna be a little different. We have season tickets but aren't going to many games for several reasons, but one of those is that you have to have a ticket. At five months.
We were leaving for vacation after the game and Emrie and Aunt Cassie decided to come up too. Granna came and kept you at Aunt Chelsie's house while everyone else went to the game. Here are a few shots from this fun day!

First Haircut

2010-09-21T10:02:00.001-07:00

We knew from the first day of your sweet little life we wouldn't make it to one year before you would have to have a haircut. Aunt Cassie wanted to do it when you were two weeks old. Momma came around a little sooner then Daddy did but he finally agreed it was time. On September 18th you got your first haircut!

BEFORE...

DURING...

AFTER... Good job Aunt Cassie!

Your precious little locks

Happy Family after your first haircut

Five Months

2010-09-16T10:00:00.000-07:00

My Lovie,
I cannot believe you are five whole months old! I don't even remember my life before you. You have rocked my world and I'm so thankful it will never be the same again. You are such a blessing in every sense of the word. Every month on the 16th I've reminesed to that day in April. From the first moments with you and through all the milestones you've already accomplished. You amaze me everyday with some new trick.
You weigh 19 lbs. and 5 oz. Are you kidding me? You are gigantic! Everyone thinks you are older then you are because you are so big. In less then three pounds we will have to get a larger carseat because you have outgrown your infant seat already. You are 24 and 3/4 inches long. That my friend is the 75% in length and don't worry you're in the 90% in the weight category. You do get really heavy quickly for other people but I guess I'm just used to it because we manage ok for quite a while. You are wearing size 3 diapers and your about to grow out of your 3-6 months clothes. You have timed that just right for the seasons to change too. You're just good like that, I guess!

You went to the nursery at church for the first time a few weeks ago and while you were there you got your first major sickness. Some sweetness shared her bronchiolitis with you. You had a horrible cough and didn't rest well. It was so scary and pitiful to hear you coughing and not knowing what to do. It was a rough first week but it slowly went away in about two weeks. Needless to say you did not go back to the nursery the following week. After sitting out for one week, we did brave going back and you did great.
You eat 6 oz. of formula every three hours or so during the day. You eat the whole thing and then sit up and burp almost immediately. You still get it all over your chin. You have started craning your head around while you're eating to see what's going on around you, which has been a bit of a challenge to keep you clean. You never spit up until the last two weeks. Now you spit up a little at least once a day. I don't know where that came from, but we have learned to hang on to the burpie for a while after you eat. You still wake up once during the night, usually around 4 am, you eat and go right back to sleep.

We started rice cereal this month and after a few days of getting used to the spoon and texture and the addition of some banana you LOVE it! You dive at the spoon if I don't get it to you fast enough. You make a HUGE mess and we have to go straight to the bathtub after you eat. So cute though!

You are very tricky these days! You can sit up pretty well.
You grab your toes and the roll from your booty to your belly while you are sitting up.

While you are on your stomach you raise that sweet head up and look all around, pushing up on your strong arms.

You roll over both ways, but not very often. It's like you know you can but you chose not to. You have discovered the high register of your voice and you lay and scream as loud as you can and then laugh, take a deep breath and go again. It's so funny to watch you crack yourself up.
You suck on your fingers ALL the time, especially your thumb, and have recently added your toes to you snack list.

You LOVE water! Whether it's a bath or pool you just kick your fat little legs and giggle.

Your hair was super long, like to the middle of your back when it's wet. You got your first haircut at five months and two days old. Your Daddy took sometime to decide it was time for your beautiful locks to be cut.

But Aunt Cassie did a great job and you look SO handsome!
You are ticklish under your arms and hate when people mess with your feet. You are still so sweet and laid back. You have such a sweet contence and laugh easily. People still stop us to talk to or about you everywhere we go!

You love to be outside and now that the weather is cooling off we are spending a lot more time outside. You do great in your stroller and you are ok in the car seat if someone is in the backseat with you.

You give sweet lovies and grab our faces, especially Daddy's beard, a lot.
You like to read and I think you are starting to remember a couple of our favorite books.
You are just so observant. You really study new places and people. This is strange to me because you always wake up in new places and we are around so many different groups of people. You like new people but you give a good look over before making up your mind to show them your sweet smile.

You know Momma and Daddy for sure. You have started reaching for us when you want one or the other. You also recognize your Aunt Cassie, Aunt Chelsie, Uncle Delton, and Granna. I think you already know that they are apart of your Momma and Daddy so you love them extra. You also have your favorite among the kids at church. You are still a big hit and enjoy getting passed around and loved on by so many people.
You have noticed Thatcher and you LOVE him! Next to Emrie he is your very favorite toy. You reach and lunge for him whenever you see him. He likes you to, but he always wants to lick your hands and feet. I think in a few more months you will both be good friends.

Like I said, Emrie is still your very favorite! You both light up when you see each other and makes both Aunt Cassie and I so happy. It's so fun to watch you start to interact with her and reach for her. She does seem to get some of your best lovies.
When you wake up from a nap you cuddle down into my neck and it's just precious. You ease your eyes open and smile and nuzzle down into me again. One of my favorite times of my day.

We also took our first official vacation to Eureka Springs, Arkansas with Gammie Diana, Uncle Delton and Bob. You were so good! I wasn't sure how you'd do but as usual you were perfect!

We also went to Stillwater for your first OSU Gameday. You stayed with Granna at Aunt Chelsie's house while Momma, Daddy, Aunt Cassie, Emrie and Uncle Delton went to the game. We can't wait to take you to your first game! You Daddy is so excited to share that passion with you.
You have been a super busy little fella. We seem to stay that way. You are the perfect addition to our family and we couldn't have assembled a more perfect fit into our family. You are just precious to my heart in a way I only imagined and dreamed of before. You are the best thing that's ever been mine!

I love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck!
Momma

For a reason

2010-09-16T09:38:00.000-07:00

We have been on vacation in Eureka Springs with Chris's family this week, and while it hasn't been the smoothest week of my life, it has brought with it some fun memories from a summer I spent in Arkansas when I was in college. The summer between my sophomore and junior years at OBU I interned at Parkway Place Baptist Church in Little Rock. It was great experience overall, but it was hard. Mostly because I had never been that far from home for that long, but it was definitely a stepping stone as I began to spread my wings.
That summer we took an overnight trip to Eureka and it's been fun walking around and remembering.
While I was in Little Rock God provided a surrogate family, especially a Momma, for me. The Greer's. The pastor of the church had two students in the youth group and his wife was very active. I immediately feel in love with their family, especially both of the Greer Girls!
I spent lots of time with Megan, who I think was about to be an 8th grader and is now a junior in college. (Are you kidding me?) We went to the movies, out to eat and shopping a lot throughout the summer. And I spent plenty of time at their house, as well. She was so much fun and it was such a blessing to be able to love on her for three months.
Nancy, my Arkansas Mom, just loved on me every chance she got. I think somedays her support was the only reason I stayed around all summer. She showed me such a beautiful picture of hospitality, love and discipleship. We talked a lot about what it was like to be married to someone in the ministry (in 2003, three years before I'd marry right into a similar position) I remember her telling me the importance of being supportive and making our house an inviting place for my husband to come home to. She shared with me hard stories of struggle inside of church work and how tough it is when people aren't nice to the man you love. Sweet Nancy taught me so much that summer! She was so fun and such a hoot! She taught me to sew, took me on fun errands just to get me out of the church and we even shared a canoe on a river trip and laughed so hard we both wet our pants a little! Haha.
I hope someday I can be that kind of encouragement to a younger sister who so badly wants to follow the path that God has for her. It was such a pivotal time in my life and Nancy was such a blessing to me at the perfect time.
I made lots of good memories that summer in Arkansas but I think I learned even more.

Four Whole Years

2010-09-05T11:06:00.001-07:00

Four years ago this weekend I married my best friend. It was an excellent decision and I haven't regretted it one single time!

Emrie Lue

2010-08-20T21:11:00.001-07:00

Today my sweet niece Emrie turned three! I cannot believe that she has been here for three whole years. She is a hoot to say the least. Her over-abundance of personality makes for lots of laughs and very few dull moments. She comes up with the craziest things! Emrie captured my heart the second I knew she was a girl during my sister's pregnancy. I was just so excited to meet her and love her. She will always hold a special piece of my heart. I have had the privilege of spending a lot of time with this sweet girl since day one and I still can't get enough of her. When I've gone a couple of weeks without a little Emrie-love I do all I can to arrange a little hang out time.
I got to take Emrie to her first movie this summer and she LOVED it! We saw Toy Story 3 and she just sat and watched so sweetly. We love to sing songs and count. She is so smart and it amazes me all she picks up on these days. That girl LOVES to shop, wear jewelry, dress up and get her nails done. She is a true girlie girl and full of drama.
It has been a true joy of my life to watch my sister love her baby girl. She makes no apologies when it comes to Emrie, but she is also paying for her raising a little bit. It's hilarious to watch! Emrie has so much of Cassie in her it is not even funny! The things she says, how she says them and her reactions to things are a mirror image of her sassy Momma.
And maybe my favorite thing lately is to watch how Emrie LOVES Tucker, most of the time. She is adjusting to not being the center of the universe all the time, but she is so sweet with him. She just kisses, hugs, pats, talks and entertains him constantly. And Tucker returns the love! He does all he can to get to her and return some of the love. They are so sweet together and are going to be good friends. She gets SUPER excited to see him and is a great little helper.
Oh my Emrie Lue what would our world look like without you? I don't even want to imagine it. You are precious, perfect, sassy and a true Meyer girl. We are all just crazy about you and it is our privilege to watch you grow and learn and change. You are so special! YOUR AUNT MAC, UNCLE CHRIS & TUCKER LOVE YOU TTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSS much!!!

Purcell, America

2010-08-16T11:50:00.001-07:00

Purcell has always been home to me. Even though I haven't lived there in ten years when I say home I'm usually referring to my hometown. Probably because my entire family is there, my heart is there. Both parents. Grandparents. Sisters. Niece. Everyone, but my family of three lives within a few miles of each other.
Our long term plan has always been to end up in Purcell. Someday. Down the road. But since Tucker has joined our family I find myself longing for us to be there sooner rather then later. All of that would be fine and a non-issue really if my husband was in any other field besides ministry. We don't just move to where we want to live, we have to be called. And right now we are most definitely called to Sayre.
We have an amazing church. One like I've never been involved with before. A pastor who not only loves us but defends, encourages, and values both Chris' ministry and mine, as well as, has the same ministry viewpoint as we do. We have a group of students that is special and passionate and really when we talk about the future we say, "we can't leave until after _______ graduates." That says something. Planning our life and ministry around students who are such a part of our lives we can't bear the thought of leaving. We have NEVER had anything remotely close to the church family we have been blessed with in Sayre. Our church LOVES my husband. They support him. They value his role. They are proud of him in a way that only people who have watched a person grow from a child into adulthood can be proud of someone.
They have welcomed Tucker into our church family with open arms! He has more grandma's than anyone can count. He is dotted on constantly. We weren't sure how everyone would feel about our adoption and the fact that our baby isn't white like the other 98% of our congregation. But they love him almost as much as we do. They have played a huge role in Tucker's life before we even knew we would have Tucker. They were so faithful to pray for us and over throughout our journey of infertility and adoption.
I have a place in our church. A vital role and ministry. They love that Chris and I do ministry together and that is not the case with every church.
But even with all those great things I still I wish my sisters were just around the corner and my mom and Nana were down the street. Weeks go by where everyday I wake up and go to sleep wishing we were closer. The two and a half hour drive (especially with a four month old who isn't too fond of his car seat) just isn't feasible as a day trip to hang out or shop or go swimming. Sometimes all the church family in the world still can't compare to having your actual family close by.
I don't know how long we will be here. I don't know if we will ever actually live in Purcell. But I really hope we do. It's funny that I get more homesick as an adult then I ever did as a kid. Someday. Maybe.

Three Months

2010-07-14T08:57:00.000-07:00

Tucker,
Three whole months have passed since that beautiful night we met you. Three months seems like such a short time, but I'm having trouble remembering what any part of my life was like before you made your grand entrance into our family. I can't put into words how full you make my heart. You are developing quite the personality and doing lots of tricks. You are very strong and a pretty big guy. We can't go anywhere without strangers complimenting you, usually on your hair, and some even try to touch (which makes me very anxious!) but they all mean well and ask lots of questions. You are a miracle to us and your story has touched many lives.
You are a regular celebrity at church. Our students adore you, grandmothers flock around you and most of the men are pretty enamored with you too. The last three months have been pretty busy. (I know I'm behind on these letters) I had a kidney stone stuck from the Sunday before you were born until you were six weeks old. So during that time we didn't spend much time alone because I was afraid of having an attack and not being able to care for you. We spent a lot of time at Granna's with the whole family. The week after I got my stone removed your Daddy started his camp schedule for the summer. He was gone to kids camp first and we spent our first night just the two of us. Your Daddy was worried but everything went fine. The next day, when I was trying to pack for both of us by myself didn't go quite as smooth. That was a stressful day!
Then came Super Summer and we spent the week at Granna's. We made two trips to Shawnee to visit. I must confess, this was a tough week for me. I love Super Summer and look forward to it every year so I was a little sad not to be there this year, but I had the best reason for missing it! We did love getting to show you off to some of our youth minister friends and even found a distant blood relative of yours. He's Kiowa too and his family is related to your birth mom's family. What a blessing to know you have a faith heritage.
Last week we all three, plus Granna, headed to Falls Creek for your first camp experience. You did great! It rained a lot which kept us inside and the weather cooler. You loved the worship services and fell asleep every night. (You did that at Super Summer too) You did pretty good during the preaching and made it almost all the way thru the services every night. You were tossed around a lot but you don't seem to mind. You love to flirt with the girls and you smile so sweetly for everyone. I think you liked Falls Creek just fine! It's a blessing to get to take you to do ministry and it's one of our goals to show our students that our family is always first. It is also important to us that we do ministry as a family, even from this point in your life. We want you to grow up loving the Lord and seeing Him work in the lives of those around you. It was different, but a good week for all of us.
Some of the things you're doing...
Pushing your butt in the air when you're on your stomach and scooting along the bed using your strong legs
Talking and smiling up a storm. This has been one of our favorite parts! You get so excited to tell us all of your stories.
You're very close to laughing out loud and sitting up. You can't quite balance your head and torso together but you're getting closer every day. And the laughing has got to be around the corner!
You found your hands last week and will not keep them out of your mouth! You LOVE them!
You love to lay on your back and kick and wiggle. You are a busy man with those arms and legs.
You definitely recognize people easily by voices and by how they hold you. You have always been a bit of a Momma's boy and you still are. Which I relish knowing how much you love me.
You have started slobbering a lot! I'm not sure why but unless you're laying down you are soaked with spit!
You follow us and other objects with your eyes and head.
You still don't act like you know Thatcher is alive but that's ok. You don't even react to his barking.
You hate sleeping on your back.
You HATE riding alone in the backseat. You aren't a fan of your car seat. I don't know if it's because it's hot or uncomfortable or what but you feel strongly about it.
You just moved into 3-6 months clothes, which is right on time. And we used your last size one diaper yesterday. You have very chunky thighs and those things just weren't cutting it.
You and I sing a lot and you get more chatty when I'm singing our fun songs and you instantly relax when we sing sleepy songs. I love that!
And my favorite new trick of yours is giving kisses. When I kiss your cheek or lean down for a kiss from above you you open your mouth and turn your head to give your Momma a kiss. It's the sweetest thing! Even if I do come away all slobbery.
You are still very laid back and sweet. I think God knew how crazy our life is and gave us a baby who'd fit right in. Someone told me last week that if God gives us what we can handle God knew he couldn't handle crazy kids and I think that might be true of us too. You are exactly what we needed!
I still look at you everyday and can barely wrap my mind around the idea that you are mine forever. You are so perfect and beautiful and you have changed my life in the very best way possible. I'm so proud to be your Momma and I love that I get to fill my days hanging out with you. You are more precious to me then any other thing in my life. I really can't put into words how your eyes melt my heart, your cries make my blood pressure shoot through the roof, how your smiles light up my world, or how your very existence intoxicates me. I love you so very much and I'm blessed by you every day. You are exactly the child God knew I needed. You are our perfect gift sweet boy!
Momma

Moments

2010-07-01T23:04:00.000-07:00

There are moments in life that you know, even while they're happening, that afterwards you'll never be the same. Whether they are good or bad. You just know. From now on - I'm changed. Some are monumental events others are more happenstance. Your wedding day, birth of a child, Salvation... those are some big milestones. These moments affect your life, maybe in ways you never expected.
One of those moments in my life came in October of my senior year of high school. It was a Friday morning. I think it was rainy that day. I was rushing into school, as usual, when a classmate grabbed me and told me one of our friends had committed suicide. I heard her but went on with my routine. About a hour later, at a school assembly called to discuss the tragedy, it hit me. Brandon was one of my good friends. He had changed schools the previous year and I hadn't seen him in a while, but we talked often and he knew he could count on me and vice versa. I feel to pieces as teachers and school staff discussed the situation. They told us we shouldn't go to the hospital and wouldn't let me leave after the meeting. I distinctly remember trying hysterically to get around several teachers because I wanted to see him. I never went. I regret that. They put Brandon on life support that Friday and he "lived" until Sunday when they unplugged his machine. My friends spent a lot of time together that weekend praying and crying together. The following Monday a bunch of us went to his house to see his mom. I'll never forget walking into that familiar living room and seeing his letter jacket hanging on the coat rack and how his mother clung to me as we cried. The next day I went to the funeral home to see his body. My mom thought it'd be a good idea to be prepared. That was awful! His casket was filled with mementos and trinkets from friends. I added one of my own and continued to mourn. His service was packed and the only two things I really remember about that is they played Creed's With Arms Wide Open and when I hugged his mom she told me that Brandon had told her I was his "back-up wife" and that he loved me a lot. As we exited the funeral home, experiencing the loss of someone my age for the first time, several of us piled into a friends Mustang. We put the top down and sang all the way to the cemetery, remembering our friend. Knowing he'd have been the life of the party even that day. We had an empty chair for him at graduation and gave his mom a flower. He would've turned 28 today. His last birthday was 10 years ago. How is that possible? I remember his birthday and death day every year. It just always comes to my mind. I don't do it on purpose.
I loved Brandon. He was a good friend. His life and death have profoundly affected my life and continue to do so. He is one of my moments.

Long Days of Summer

2010-07-01T20:56:00.000-07:00

It's been a long week. We've had a lot going on getting ready for Falls Creek next week and we had VBS at our church so that always makes things hectic. I think it's felt so long for several reasons.
#1. I've had a MAJOR sinus issue for the last week and have felt like poo most of the time. I have literally used 2 1/2 boxes of kleenex in the last week! I have just felt worthless! And I still have a baby to take care of even though I'm sick. (side note: that is a not so fun side of motherhood.)
#2. The week before camp is always worse then the actual week of camp. There feels like so much that needs to be done and planned for and packed. Add a two month old baby into that mix and that's enough to make anyone feel a little stressed.
#3. Because I have Tucker, Chris is having to do a lot more without me. Which he is doing a great job and is more than capable, but still it's different.
#4. We've had a bit of drama going on around our student ministry (not because of students) and this has been heavy on both our hearts. Very heavy.
Several things I've been wrestling with personally: Why as staff members of a church are we expected to take all people dish out without looking out for ourselves/families? Someone once told Chris that he was the only hired hand some people would ever have. I think that's awful, but what's worse is the truth of that statement. The church is a hard place to work sometimes. Being a wife of a minister isn't easy sometimes because you have to hear people be mean about/to your husband. Sometimes it's hard because people are mean to you! I think God gave us discerning minds and spirits just like everyone else and I'm not going to be guilty of not using them when I feel His leading!
Another thought: As a partner in my husband's ministry I've been having to remind myself that I am not a church employee. I don't have to be in the fat middle of every little thing at church like I have been for the past four years. It's been a hard lesson for me to learn. I'm still working on it. Tucker is without question my priority, but I still feel like I need to be doing all I've always done. A parent told me today that I didn't need to feel obligated to do all that and I really needed to hear that. Today God has sent me three separate encouragement's because He knew I needed them. It's been one of those weeks that I've felt attacked all week. I have been snappy at my husband for silly things because I can't express my feelings to anyone else. Poor guy! He's been a real trooper through my mood swings, sickness and stress this week!
But Falls Creek is almost here! I'm so excited to see what the Father is going to do in the lives of our students and in my own life next week. I'm excited to take Tucker to camp for the first time. Next week has to be good because of the things that have been put before us this week. His mercies are new every morning and this week I've needed a whole new batch everyday!

Three Week HolliB pictures

2010-06-18T19:31:00.001-07:00

These are a few of my favorite shots from HolliB's newborn session with Tucker. (www.hollibphotography.com) She's so good! When your best friends are immensely talented you gotta play to their strengths. He's so big now and already looks totally different but, enjoy my sweet baby anyway!

Heart Storage

2010-06-08T08:16:00.000-07:00

I've always heard how Mary treasured the things surrounding Jesus' birth and infancy in her heart and until Tucker I couldn't truly appreciate what that meant. So to make sure I remember the little things that I love most I'm going to make a list. Here are just some of my favorites...
How Tucker holds my finger when I'm feeding him his bottle.
The way only I can soothe him sometimes. He's already a bit of a Momma's boy and I LOVE it! Maybe a little too much.
How his butt fits into one hand.
The feeling of his angel soft hair.
Any noise he ever makes. Cooing, grunting or sometimes even his cries are cute.
His weight against my chest. It is the most soothing feeling to feel us breath together.
How I feel to see others love my baby. Especially my grandparents and parents. It's crazy how a baby can melt hearts and conquer life long prejudices in just a few seconds.
His studious expressions as he investigates new people, places and situations. (Which seems like almost every time he wakes up. Poor guy always in a new place)
His soft cheek against mine.
His response to my voice when others are holding him.
How he loves me to sing him to sleep. He already calms down when we sing songs.
How tight he grips my finger. That was the first way I got to touch him as the nurse cleaned him off in the delivery room so I think that will always be a special feeling to me.
When he's hungry or just wants his paci, how he'll suck on my shoulder or neck until I can get what he wants in his mouth.
When I know/think he's hungry my test is to kiss close to his mouth and if he is hungry he will turn his head and try to suck on my lips. Precious kisses!

And my sweet boy is waking so that's all for now. I'm sure this will be a running list.

Two in one day!

2010-06-03T16:21:00.001-07:00

I know I just posted but my baby is sleeping good this evening so...

I came across this on another blog and thought I'd humor myself for a few minutes. Go ahead and try it yourself...it will either make you say, "wow I've done a lot of things in my life!" OR "wow - I really need to get out more." In my case...it was the latter. Go through and highlight the ones that apply to you!

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band...sang with one but I don't think it counts
4. Visited Hawaii...HONEYMOON
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disney
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped or cliff jumped ...ah Vic Falls. One of my fondest memories.
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a thunder and lightning storm
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child...Biggest blessing of my life. Seriously.
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables...I sometimes think I would like that but...
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked... I don't know if being picked up and riding with a scary man to a gas station counts but it happened in college
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill...oh the days of dating my husband. I was NOT a good employee.
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon...don't understand the motivation to do something so crazy!
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run...yeah right do you know me?
32. Been on a cruise...great college memories! And we're going again in August with the fam.
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied...livin' on love baby!
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing...thank you Steven Charles
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David in person
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa...One of those experiences that literally made me who I am.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling...another illegal activity supervised, no initiated by my mother.
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater...one of our favorite Chickasha activities
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies...oh thin mints sound sooo delicious!
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason...that's the only time I get them. The hubs doesn't like to be predicatble
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Been sky diving...on the bucket list. I wanted to do it before motherhood, guess that didn't work out.
66. Visited a Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book...do the ones you make online count? I've done that.
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car...we just got a new to us car that we LOVE. Hooray for the Volvo!
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Gotten a tattoo
94. Had a baby...kinda. That's an upcoming post. All about my un-pregnancy.
95. Seen the Alamo in person...Senior Trip 2001
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Well that was fun for me if no one else. Hope you enjoyed it!

A New Summer

2010-06-03T15:16:00.000-07:00

This summer feels different. It is going to be different, at least for me. Summer for the Gordon's usually means camps, kids, trips, no sleep and something going all the time and for one of us it still will be. But for Momma G all of that has changed. It was inevitable and I knew it was coming. However, that knowledge hasn't lessened the blow.
As soon as we found out Tucker was coming I backed out of all of my summer commitments without hesitation. Summer is now here and Super Summer is next weekend and I'm not going. for real. I guess I just feel left out in some ways. In youth ministry summer is our busy season. It's the time where relationships flourish and memories are made. I don't know what that looks like with an infant. Tucker has changed everything about our life and we love it, this piece of the puzzle is just harder somehow.
From Chris's perspective - he is bummed because he will be apart from us so much of the time and I won't be by his side for every event. He isn't as excited as usual because he still HAS to do all that we usually do together. When you spend the majority of your time working together it's hard when half of the team is missing.
Usually by this point in the year I have been at the church at least three days a week for several weeks. I have to do lists in order. People lined up to help. Copies of forms color coded. Office and medical boxes ready for trips. But not this year. I haven't even figured out how to shower everyday little alone how to accomplish life as it used to be. I'm not complaining. I LOVE getting to be a Momma and I wouldn't trade it. All of this is just part of the transition process and I don't know that having nine months instead of three weeks to get ready would've made any difference for this leg of the journey.

First Doctor's Visits

2010-05-22T13:28:00.000-07:00

We have an AMAZING doctor. He and Chris grew up together and he's been SUPER supportive and helpful throughout different stages of our adoption process. We were so excited to introduce him to Tucker and also see how our boy was doing.
When Tucker was born he weighed 7 lbs, 15 oz. While in the hospital he lost down to 7.10 but was already eating very well. He was 20 inches long at birth.
At his two week appointment he weighed 8 lbs 5 oz and had grown to 21.25 inches. I couldn't believe how much he'd grown in just two weeks.
At Tuck's one month appointment I knew my chunky monkey had gained weight. He weighed 10 lbs, 8 oz! Are you kidding me? I couldn't believe he'd gained over two pounds in two weeks! He had only grown 1/2 inch but our doctor was very please with Tucker and said not to worry about his weight. I guess it'll all balance out in time.
His other MAJOR achievement is when he was 13 days old he showed us that he could roll over from his belly to his back. We were at my mom's and were having some tummy time while we were sitting in the floor chatting. He did it and we both were amazed! I didn't realize how early he was doing this until our one month appointment when we told our doctor. He LOVES to be his stomach and since he can roll over we're letting him sleep that way most of the time. He is now sleeping in five hour stretches at night which is SUPER nice, especially for me.
We are so glad he's adjusting well and growing strong. We had heard a lot about attachment and adjustment with adopted babies and their forever families so I had been very concerned about that. But Dr. Whinery said that unattached-unadjusted babies don't gain weight and do as well as Tucker is. We're so glad it's obvious he's happy! Because we couldn't be more smitten with our precious boy!

Birth Story

2010-04-21T15:40:00.000-07:00

I know this is a long time coming. So without further adieu...
TUCKER IS HERE! His birth was indescribable in words. It was the most emotional, amazing experience of my life. The biggest testament to the faithfulness of our God and a beautiful picture of what God did for us when we accept his salvation. I cannot put into words the love I feel for Tucker and the bond I have with his Birth Mom, K.
The day of his birth was surreal. It was as if time didn't really exist, at least in it's normal parameters. At times it felt like it was lasting forever and then at other points it felt like it was speeding by and I wouldn't be able to absorb all that was happening.
Thursday morning I got up and we packed for a couple of days stay in Purcell. We needed to make a few returns and get some last minute items before Tucker got here. Before going to Purcell we were going to Lawton to go to K's last weekly doctor appointment. We were about 30 minutes from our house when I got a text asking me to call her. I did, in the worst reception area of the entire drive from Sayre to Lawton, and got bits and pieces. She thought her water had broken. She was at the hospital getting checked. She'd let me know any news as soon as she knew something. Chris sped up and called a Highway Patrol friend and we began contacting family. We made the last hour and a half of the drive in about a hour. When we arrived at the hospital, around 2 p.m, we discovered her water had indeed broken and we spent the afternoon waiting and calling family and friends. I couldn't believe it was really happening.
By dinner time Team Tucker had arrived. My mom, sisters, Nana, Dad and Chris' Mom. So had our adoption coordinator, Dierdra. She suggested we all go to dinner and take our time out of the hospital. We spent about two hours away and that was all I could take. When we got back K had made little progress. She was dilating about 1/2 a centimeter an hour. She progressed this way until she reached a 7. At that point things really started picking up. Also around that time I had a kidney stone attack. I had to take a pain pill, do some walking and drinking and hugging a chair. But as things picked up that pain quickly became a non-issue.
K's foster mom was supposed to be her support in the delivery room. She was allowed to have three people in there and she had chosen Chris & I along with her mom. But when things were getting serious she couldn't get a hold of her mom. So K added my sister, who is a photographer, to the bunch. This allowed us to have documentation of the entire birth.
Also because her mom wasn't there I got to step in and be K's birth coach. I held her hand, wiped her faced, got in her face, helped her breath and even held her leg as she pushed. It was more then I ever even dared to pray for. I still can't really put into words the bond and the emotions of those hours I spent with K as we both did all we could to usher Tucker into the world safely and quickly. She was a trooper!
The nurse finally told her she could start pushing and got the doctor on call a little before 2 a.m. When she started pushing the doctor realized her cervix wasn't all the way out of the way. So she had to stop and rearrange and lay all funky to get it to move out of the way. This was the intense part. She wanted to push so bad and I had to keep her from it. After about 30 minutes she got to try again.
The team came back in and we all repositioned ourselves for Tucker's grand entrance. She pushed through one ten-count and as she started with the second ten-count the nurse said, "Look he's crowning." Before Chris could take the three steps from where he was standing to the bed Tucker was here. The doctor even looked a little startled.
This was it.
This was the moment.
We were parents. All three of us.
Immediately we all three, well four including my sister, were crying. From the moment he was here K said, "there's your son, your son is here." I leaned over and she and I hugged for a long moment as we cried in celebration of Tucker's arrival. Relishing that moment together. That accomplishment together. The love that we both felt for Tucker as his mothers, even though our roles are so different.
As soon as Tucker was clean I got to put on his very first diaper and pick him up. I was already so in love! Chris got to hold him second and then he passed him to K. She looked him over and kissed and loved on him. She then graciously turned and handed him back to me.
After a few quite moments just us, Team Tucker couldn't wait any longer. You would have never known it was 3 a.m. by seeing everyone's excitement and tears. He was passed around between our family and then our family of three made our way to the nursery. This was a part of the process I never thought about because normally the momma has just delivered a baby, but since I hadn't just birthed a child I got to be in there.
We gave him his first bath, which he didn't enjoy much, and by 5 a.m. we got to wheel our baby into our hospital room and just be a family.
Chris slept a little and I laid wide awake and just marveled at this precious baby boy.
WELCOME TO THE WORLD AND OUR FAMILY TUCKER WILLIAM GORDON!
7 lbs. 15 oz, 20 in. long born at 2:50 a.m.

Waiting, Painting, Showers & Stones

2010-04-14T10:11:00.000-07:00

There is not any monumental news to report. We've just been working like crazy the last week to get all the little details in order for Tucker. Our birth mom has been having back contractions for several days now so it could really be any time. She thought she was going into labor Sunday night but turned out to be false labor. So we are just on call to head to Lawton at ANY moment.
Last week we painted the nursery and it turned out really cute! I can't wait for our bedding to come in and to put the final touches on the room. The paint came out a little darker then I wanted but when it was all sat and done it looks great. We did stripes on one wall with a monogram done by my sister's friend. I LOVE it! It just adds so much personality to the room. When we started looking a baby boy stuff I thought I wanted to go pretty traditional, but it turns out I don't so much love the pastel "baby" colors. Tucker will be able to grow into his room and the room has a great vibe to it. Chris and I have found ourselves just hanging out in there waiting on Tucker to make the room his own. It was a lot of work, but I think the end result was worth it.
Last weekend our church and our students had showers for us. On Saturday the whole church gave us so much stuff! It was really a cool day. Our families came and got to see the nursery and meet some of our church family. We are so blessed to be apart of FBC Sayre. We have been in some places that were not so great so we really appreciate having a church home and family. Finding that is different when you are on staff at a church. We are just blessed to have found that. Tucker has so many grandma's already and we're so glad he will be loved by so many! On Sunday night our youth threw us a shower. All by themselves! They had food, cake, drinks, games and gifts. They did an AMAZING job! I'd put our kids up against anyones. They are all so excited to be apart of Tuck's life and already love him so much. They got us TONS of diapers, wipes and other really practical things that are great. One of our 8th girls even MADE Tucker a blanket...I cried when I opened it. I mean just super sweet! So I think as far as "stuff" goes we're covered.
On Sunday morning about 5 a.m. I woke up having some major pain and I knew I was trying to pass my 3rd kidney stone. I waited a couple of hours until Chris's alarm went off and told him I thought we needed to go to the ER because my doctor had told me they weren't going to pass on their own. We went, got a shot and a script for pain meds and came home. I tried to rest until time for our shower that night. I went to the shower and shortly after we got home I started puking and we decided to go back to the ER. I was miserable to say the least. We got the call from our Birth Mom as I was laying on the gurney in the ER. When she called I just cried! I didn't want to be in the delivery room feeling like I was dying while our son was being born! So we waited and heard she wasn't in labor. We were super relieved. They admitted me to the hospital and we stayed until around lunch time yesterday. The diagnosis is that I have a good sized stone at the top of my uritor and until it moves they can't do anything because the procedure that I need isn't cover by our insurance and costs $25,000 so our only option is to wait. Now this wouldn't be great news at any time but when your baby is coming sometime in the next week it really presents a problem! I know there is a reason for all of this but it's hard to see. Please pray that this stone passes quickly and on its own! I'm in pain but my larger concern is having to deal with all of this after Tucker comes or when he comes.
I think that's pretty much it! I'll upload some nursery and shower pictures soon.

Ultrasound

2010-04-03T05:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my Mom and I got to see our Tucker on the ultrasound. It was pretty amazing and it wasn't even one of the fancy ones, just a regular one.

We got to see his profile.

What his little foot looks like,

His face. How much he weighs right now, & that he is DEFIANTLY a boy! (I'll leave that picture off to save future humiliation) It was such a fun experience and I'm so glad I got to share it with my mom.
Golf season has put a slight damper on Chris getting to do everything with me, which I understand but still makes me a little sad. I'm used to doing everything with him because his job schedule is pretty flexible so it's rough on me when he can't get away. But he had a tournament yesterday in Weatherford so it was just one of those things. (Got 3rd place! Way to go Coach G & Boys)
However last night he decided to drive to Purcell because he couldn't wait to see me and pictures of Tucker. He was so cute when he got here last night. He went straight to the computer and had me explain what he was looking at as he looked through the pictures one at a time over and over. He's a cute Daddy-to-be!
After the ultrasound my mom and I made a Hobby Lobby stop and got several really fun/cute things! I got to pick out fabric that my Aunt Teresa is going to use to make Tuck a quilt and it's uber cute! I also stocked up on some half off frames and several other little projects for Tuck's Welcoming Parties. This baby shopping is so fun! Few things are actually as good as you imagine them to be, but this truly is! We're spending today with family, although I'm sure some more shopping might sneak in too!

FAITH

2010-04-02T07:58:00.000-07:00

A certain amount of faith goes into most things in life. But with adoption you have to have an extra dose because of the amount of trust involved with both sides. We have to trust that our birth mom has been honest with information about her child and that she will do what she says she's going to do. And she has to believe that we will follow through with what we've said we'll do. And even though there haven't been any signs either way, it's still hard to believe a total stranger sometimes. Different days I feel different things and today I'm just a little nervous that something could go wrong. Not that I think it's going to, but just that doubt that creeps in sometimes is getting to me today. Which is interesting because today is Good Friday, a day of victory! My attitude needs to change from one of doubt to one of victory!
Yesterday I got to go to a doctor's appointment with our Birth Mom. I got to hear Tucker's heartbeat for about a minute and tried to let Chris hear it over the phone. Her doctor was really great and super sweet! He asked me several questions and was very excited to meet me and to finalize our birth plans. It was a great day! It was another big day. But then again everyday these days seems to be big. It was a wonderful sound that I could've listened to all day! I taped it but I'm not sure how to get it on here, I'll work on it!
I also got to meet some of our Birth Mom's family, which was a pleasure. They had several questions for me, naturally. But overall I think that meeting went well too.
But one of the most exciting things is that today I get to go back to the doctor with our Birth Mom for an ultrasound! I did not expect them to do another ultrasound this late in her pregnancy but they scheduled it yesterday. I can't wait to see our baby's face and feet and hands and everything else! I thought this would be something I didn't get to have with this baby but our Birth Mom is just so gracious to us. Chris has a golf tournament today so once again he won't get to be there, but I'll tape that too so maybe tomorrow there will be two videos!

Meeting our Birth Mom

2010-03-30T08:14:00.000-07:00

We got to meet our Birth Mom Saturday and it went better then expected. In the beginning everyone was a little uncomfortable and nervous, but as the hour and half went on we all relaxed and got to know each other a little bit. She is as sweet as can be and a very good mother to her nine month old daughter. She has a had a hard life and is just unable to provide for herself and two children. The highlight, for me, of our time together was asking her if she'd pick Tucker's middle name. We felt like she deserved that and that he would always be honored that he had a name from us and from his Birth Mom. She was blown away. You could tell she was not expecting that, but that she really wanted to do it. She invited me to go to the doctor with her Thursday. This is the first week of her every week appointments and I'll get to hear Tucker's heartbeat! I'm so excited I can hardly wait for Thursday to get here. Everything we have hoped for our Birth Mom has offered. We haven't had to ask for anything but she has said that she wants us to hold him first, to cut his umbilical cord, to stay at the hospital with him, that our families can come and visit in the hospital just anything we've thought we'd like to happen, but would've never expected she is graciously offering. At the end of our meal together we exchanged phone numbers and got to visit a little while yesterday. She is just such a sweet blessing! I really think in time we made add her and her daughter to the family as well! This is another answered prayer. I've been asking God to give us the opportunity to be a blessing to our Birth Mom like she has blessed us and the Lord gave us a teenager who only has a foster family herself to love and encourage. Continue to pray for our Birth Mom as she faces the last days of her pregnancy!

Baby Business

2010-03-26T06:09:00.000-07:00

I've had baby fever for three solid years now and we've been trying that long. April will be three years since we took any preventative measures. It's been hard, really hard sometimes. It's tough to see others getting what you want so desperately, but through this time I've been able to see why God tarried in certain times in our life. But since moving to Sayre in October of 2008 it's been harder to see why God hasn't allowed us to create life. I've been to doctors and been on medicine and celebrated with what seems like a million friends as they have become Mommies, all to no avail.
At the end of October of 2009 I went to Women of Faith with our church. I went to hang out with grown-ups and was fairly overwhelmed and uncomfortable because it's so different from the youth events I'm used to. But Stephen Curtis Chapmen performed and he talked about adoption and his family's story and it just broke my heart. I spent a summer in Africa in college and I knew then someday I wanted to adopt but both Chris and I thought it would be later. Ya know how we like to plan things? Well our plan was to get married, have a couple kids of our own, & THEN adopt from Zambia. But the Lord has a weird sense of humor and His plans, as usual, were a little different from ours. I came home from that conference hesitant to talk to Chris about adopting. He told me he needed to focus on one thing at a time so I held it in for about a week. When I couldn't wait to talk to him about it any longer I approached the subject with great sensitivity only to find out he'd too had it on his heart. In the days following we started checking into local agencies. I knew I wanted an infant so DHS wouldn't be the route we'd take. All contacts pointed to one place... Deaconess Pregnancy & Adoption in Oklahoma City. We called, got on their website & finally applied in November. We just fell in love with them and their approach. All roads seemed to lead to DPAS for us. The first step was to attend a weekend educational conference in February so in the mean time we talked with family members and researched and tried to prepare. After the conference in February we filled out a mountain of paper work and have just been waiting for our approval.
Until this week. Everything changed this week.
When we got home last weekend from our CRAZY ski trip our FBI background checks were waiting on us and we were so excited! They told us it would take 6-8 weeks to get those babies back so we were elated when they arrived in only 3 weeks. On Monday I mailed those in along with our profile book.
DPAS received our FBI Background Checks, our profile book, our last reference letter & our DHS background check all on Tuesday. That NEVER happens! Tuesday evening we get an email saying that they are ready to move forward and wanted to do our Home Study soon because there are birth mom's approaching their due dates and aren't matched. So we celebrated! We were so excited for things to be moving along so smoothly.
Wednesday was Golf Coach Chris Gordon's first tournament and to top it off Sayre was the host so to say he's been stressed this week would be a massive understatement. So we both spent Wednesday at the golf course. Around 3:30 he was tallying scores and things were hectic. There were nearly 100 people in a space that was designed to maybe hold 30. I was sitting by watching him do his thing and I got a phone call from a number I'd seen before that day. Holly from DPAS called earlier Wednesday to set up our home study so I assumed she was calling me back to tell me something else. When I answered it wasn't Holly, it was Dierdre. Now I thought this was wierd but I figured she had a question for me so I fought my way through a cloud of high school golfers and got to where I could hear her. Then she said words I'll never forget..."I have someone here who has some good news for you!" I knew then. I started crying, no weeping. Uncontrollably. Shocked. Then a soft voice came through the line and she introduced herself and then told me that she was having a baby boy on April 20th and she'd like to place him in our home!!! I couldn't even form words to express my humble gratitudte to this wonderful stranger! She had looked at our book Tuesday evening and chosen us. I ran to grab Chris, pushing my way through a sea of boys and grabbing him as I tried desperately, but without success to pull myself together. I pulled him outside and handed him the phone and our Birth Mom shared the news with him. We both were just overwhelmed because we didn't think DPAS could even show our book to anyone until after our home study, but they did!
WE ARE HAVING A BABY BOY IN LESS THEN A MONTH!!!!
As soon as we got home we began calling family and sharing our news. Everyone just freaked out and we all still are. Things are helter skelter for sure as we scurry to do in three weeks what most have 9 months to accomplish but we have the most wonderful families & church family to help us.
I spent Thursday talking with people about shower dates, making invite lists, picking our nursery decor, crying several times throughout the day with my mom and sister, and trying to obsorb all of this miracle.
Today, Friday, we are in Purcell & are going to spend the day registering for baby stuff. Whirlwind doesn't even begin to describe this feeling, but it's the greatest one I've ever had.
I'm going to be a Momma. In 25-ish days. To a Baby Boy who we are naming Tucker. We just feel so incredibly blessed!
A little background on Tuck: his Birth Mom is Mexican & Native American and his Birth Dad is African American. His Birth Mom's Mother died when she was 12 and she spent her teenage years in foster care with a Korean family. She had a baby girl in June of 2009 (do the math!) and is only 19. She knows she can't parent both of these children. Tucker hasn't been exposed to ANY drugs or alcohol during the pregnancy and our Birth Mom has been to the OBGYN since her second month. We get to meet her tomorrow! She wants us in the delivery room & at the hospital, but after that is unsure about how much of a relationship she wants with us & Tucker. She is my hero and I love her so much without even meeting her!
Please pray for us! The next few weeks are going to be insanely crazy! Here are a few specifics...
- Continued Safety for Tucker and his Birth Mom
- That things will go smoothly tomorrow and we would bond with her instantly & easily
- That she has been honest and will follow through with her commitment
- Finances! Since it is so much faster then we thought God is going to have to provide!
- For us. That we would not only get all the preparations done for physical things but that we would also be prepared emotionally & spiritually. And that we would be able to remember these days with great clarity so we can continue to tell what God has done!
TO HIM BE THE GLORY!!!

Ski Trip '10: Warning it's LONG!

2010-03-23T12:26:00.000-07:00

So I've felt like I haven't had anything "blog worthy" to write about for a long time. There are things going on, but I'm just not quite ready to release them to the whole wide world. But even as this trip was unfolding I was thinking...BLOG POST!
I'll start from the beginning... About a month ago a family from our church invited us to go skiing with them in Pagosa Springs, CO at Wolf Creek. We went back and forth about going or not because we've been trying to save as much money as possible for some other goals. But in the end we decided we'd go. It's hard to turn down a ski trip where all you have to pay for is gas, rentals & lift tickets. The plan was we'd leave as soon as church was over last Sunday, but Chris was sick so we didn't leave until Tuesday morning. Again after much deliberation.
We skied half a day Wednesday and things were going well. That night we went to the natural hot springs and soaked our sore muscles, it was wonderful! Thursday was going to be everyone's last day to ski so we got up and at it early. Chris and I both decided to get different boots because ours were hurting the day before. After a little while we got our skis on and up on the lift. As we started to get off the lift I heard Chris smack against the icy ramp. I thought to myself, "Great way to start the day!" I'm not so sympathetic, especially with my husband, until I realized he couldn't talk. The ski patrol and lift operators rushed over to him and were asking all kinds of questions and he couldn't answer. That scared me! But as they continued to check him out he came around and we thought was going to still be able to ski. But Chris ended up getting a free ride to the bottom of the hill curtsey of Steve with Wolf Creek ski patrol.

We both spent the rest of the day at the lodge because I was worried about my little husband. The next day was Friday. We knew a storm was supposed to hit Oklahoma so we decided to come home early. We left Pagosa around 2 p.m. and thought we'd be at least an hour or two ahead of all nasty weather. We made it about four hours to Clines Corners, New Mexico.

About three miles north of the gas station that is that town we slid off into the ditch. Chris handled things wonderfully and I really wasn't too worried. A very nice man saw us go off the road and turned around to pull us out. We decided to stop at Clines Corners and go to the bathroom and fill up before heading east on I-40. Much to our dismay the interstate was closed right before we arrived. So we debated our options: wait it out in our car, try to drive 30-ish miles west and try to find a hotel, or navigate around I-40. All the while the storm getting worse. We opted for option #1. A night in our car. Neither of us had ever slept in our car before so we knew we were in for an adventure!

After a lovely dinner from Subway, compliments of the gas station we got settled in for the night. It was funny to watch the hysteria that people were feeling. I mean buying bags of sandwiches just in case we were there for days or something! I've never seen Subway be such a hot commodity before! It really could've been a lot worse! We could've had our youth with us, been left on the side of the road, or I could've been by myself. We made some serious memories! We read a book, we laughed and I self medicated. I soon realized sleep wasn't going to come on it's own so I took a tylenol PM and slept well till about 4 am. We slept in our coats with the car running and a window cracked. The Element really wasn't too bad! I mean it wouldn't be my first choice, but we definitely got a much earlier start on Saturday then we would've otherwise. We got on I-40 about 6:30 Saturday morning. We drove several hours to Santa Rosa, NM and stopped here for breakfast.

I just wanted to be out of the car! Plus this place is the kind of place that my husband LOVES! He wishes he could host Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives, I think that is his dream job. We also used this stop as an opportunity to "freshen-up."

We were able to make the rest of the trip without incident. It was a super LONG trip but definitely a memory we won't soon forget. After only 26 hours we arrived back in Sayre. (It should've only taken 10 hours) We picked up our dog, showered, and got to sleep in OUR bed. Never underestimate the power of your own bed! It works wonders! Here we are all clean & ready for bed in our bed. A happy family once again!

You gotta try this!

2010-01-12T13:08:00.001-08:00

So a few weeks ago a friend of mine from Facebook was talking about Baked Oatmeal so I decided to try it when my Mother-in-law came to visit last weekend. It's delicious, easy and it's lasted several day. So I thought I'd share the recipe with all of you. It's my new favorite breakfast I think! I'm not a huge oatmeal fan but this is like the middle ground between the crunchiness of granola and the soupiness that regular oatmeal offers. Give it a try and let me know what you think!

Baked Oatmeal
1/2 cup of vegetable oil
3/4 cup of sugar
2 eggs
1 cup of milk
1/2 tsp. salt
1 Tbsp. Baking powder
3 cups of quick cooking oats
1/2 cup raisins (I didn't have any raisins so I used craisins and I REALLY like it)
2 Tbsp. Brown Sugar
1/2 tsp. Cinnamon
Beat together oil and sugar. Add eggs, milk, salt, baking powder & oatmeal. Beat well then stir in raisins. Pour into a greased pie plate. Sprinkle with brown sugar and cinnamon. Refrigerate overnight.
Bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes.
Serve warm with butter.

ENJOY!!!

Christmas Letter

2009-12-01T21:05:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS FAMILY & FRIENDS!

We hope that this letter finds you well and that your 2009 was a great year. We have had a wonderful year and are looking forward to what 2010 holds for our family.
In October of last year we moved to Sayre, Oklahoma where Chris is the youth minister at First Baptist. When I sent this letter last year we were barely settled in here, but after a year in Western Oklahoma we are at home.
We have had a wonderful year ministerially. We were able to do everything we ever wanted to do over the summer and this fall and have seen a great growth among our students in their faith. We have seen students come to Christ, surrender to the ministry & commit to living a sold out life to Christ - nothing better then that! We have three students that have felt called to go to England or Wales next summer with iGo Students (the mission trip sponsored by Falls Creek) and we have decided to go with them.
We will spend ten days next July in either London, England or Cartiff, Wales ministering to the people there. The reason iGo sends people to those areas is because they are a crossroads of sorts. There are a lot of people groups represented in that area whose countries are closed to the Gospel and/or missionaries. We would ask all of you for your prayer support as we raise $6,000 to cover the cost of our trip and as we go. Also we’d be honored if you would consider supporting us financially as we fulfill God’s call on our life. We are so excited to see all God has planned for our time overseas and for what He will do in our lives, as well as, the lives of the three special students who are going with us. We will be working hard all year to raise money and make sure all five us get to go to Europe safely. If you are interested in supporting us financially you may make your tax deductible donation to First Baptist Church Sayre at 2 Darla Drive Sayre, OK 73662.
Looking back over 2009 it seems to be an uneventful year in comparison to last year! We have worked hard at developing relationships with our students in Sayre and planting our lives in this community. Our prayer is for longevity here. Sayre feels more and more like home all the time. We are blessed with a wonderful staff to work with, a supportive church family who prays and supports us, and students that make us want to do our very best.
Chris is looking forward to the spring because he has been named the Sayre High School Boys Golf Coach. This is a dream fulfilled for him because he gets to be a coach and paid to play golf all while hanging out with students. He is so excited to be the coach of his alma mater’s team that he spent many days and hours in high school investing in.
I am substituting at the high school and volunteering at the church. These things keep me as busy as I want to be. We are still working on adding to our family, but the Lord’s timing for us to have a baby is still not here. We are constantly asking for that blessing and for patience as we wait for His best and His plans in that area. Our only “baby” for now is our dog, Thatcher. We love the little guy and sometimes he is all the kid we think we can handle.  We are blessed to have you all as our friends and family and we hope you have a safe and happy Holiday season!

-Love- Chris & McKenzie Gordon

Settled

2009-10-01T15:57:00.000-07:00

What a difference a year makes! Last year at this time we had just left Lubbock and were living upstairs at my grandparents house in Purcell. Neither Chris or I had a job or any real plans. But all of that changed a year ago today. One year ago we were offered the position as Youth Minister at First Baptist Church of Sayre. After one interview I was scared and hesitant even though it was at least an option.
We had already moved twice in four months and left two churches in as much time. My heart hurt and I didn't know if I wanted to open myself up to the kind of hurt I was still sorting through. Chickasha, our first ministry together, was never ideal. It was a mediocre place with wonderful people who were very comfortable and didn't see much need for progress. Because there was no push or no evidence that anything we did mattered, we didn't do much. Nothing we did was ever wrong, per say, but it was never the right thing either. When we moved to Lubbock we were so sure God was moving us there and that He had big plans for us in a bigger church and a bigger city. I knew it would stretch us, partly because I was 7 hours away from home and family and partly because of how the church was ran. We arrived in mid-May and straight out of the gate were met with one adversity after another, mostly from the same people over and over. One Thursday in September my husband came to me and said he was done. After much prayer, advice, and disappointment we loaded our things and by the following Tuesday were home. Sayre is Chris' home town and so we'd been here several times to visit family and I NEVER thought I'd live here. I'm from a small town but this is a smaller one that is way more remote than I was used to. It seemed so dirty and poor and kinda sad. But after a four hour interview and my husband asking me to trust his confidence that this is where we were supposed to be I submitted to a third move in 2008. On the morning of October 2nd, 2008 we met with our pastor for the second day in a row and he offered us the job and said he needed to know that day. We went to lunch and I tried to think of every reason we shouldn't come while Chris played the opposite role. I was gun shy and didn't think we could make a difference.
But on this side of that crazy situation I can't imagine being anywhere else. My prayers have changed from "move us" to ones for longevity. We talk regularly about watching different kids graduate and this being our last youth ministry because we never want to leave. Our pastor is perfectly suited for our ministry style and is constantly encouraging us. Last summer we were able to do everything we wanted, now maybe we shouldn't have crammed it all into one summer, but still we had never been allowed that freedom before. And we have just finished interviews for a leadership team, which is what we are most excited about. I can't imagine if I'd held on to my fears and if my husband was selling cars or houses or insurance right now. What countless blessings we would've missed out on. Feeling settled does something for my soul, maybe a women's soul, I don't know. It makes me feel secure and at home, if that makes any sense. I'm just so thankful to be home and for the shape our ministry here has taken. It was a bumpy ride but now that we're here it was worth it.

Three Years Ago

2009-09-02T09:27:00.000-07:00

Today is our third anniversary. It seems like so long ago, but three years sounds kind of pittily. We attended a 50th Anniversary party over the weekend and I was so inspired by the work and memories that go into a lifetime together. Here are a few memories from our first three years. Only 47 more to go...

Two became one

We bought and renovated our first house
Before

After

Made great memories

Chris finished his degree (I don't know how to rotate pictures on my blog)

Welcomed a new member to our family. Our niece, Emrie Meyer Hays! The love of my life!

Though there have definitely been some bumps in our road there is no one I'd rather make this journey with. Chris is my best friend and I'm so lucky to have married such a compassionate, caring, loving man. He is more then I knew to ask God for. Here's to many more years together!

Holli B

2009-07-09T11:36:00.000-07:00

So a lot of my close friends are having birthdays all together and I love telling the world about how amazing all of them are...Todays focus is on one of my best friends HOLLI BREWER. She is one of my oldest friends. We met and started hanging out when I was a freshmen in high school. She is my one friend that I can honestly say I'd do anything with and have done more than I would with anyone other than my husband. She made me breakfast in bed on my wedding day, she and I worked together at my very first job, we have been each others confidants, embarrassing secret keepers, and many other things. She is probably one of my most talented friends. She has started her own photography business (www.hollibphotography.com) a few years ago and she is AMAZING!!! She has since shots tons of weddings, families, and babies. I already have her booked for my baby's birthing shoot, whenever that may happen. Every time I look at her website tears come to my eyes because I'm so proud of my precious friend. She is also a wonderful wife and mother. She was my first friend to get married so therefore she was the first bachelorette party I got to throw. So many fun memories. Holli has two beautiful babies that each time I met them she asked me if they were really as cute as she thought they were. We were always afraid that when we had kids that they'd actually not be as cute as we thought so we made a pact to tell each other if ours weren't. Lucky for Holli B. both of hers were and still are two of the most beautiful kids EVER! Maybe one of my favorite things about Holli is that we never have to pretend to be something we're not. We can always be 100% honest with each other and just be. We both understand that sweat pants can fix almost any problem, that a good dessert covers a multitude of sins, and that best friends are to be treasured. We also lucked out that our husbands became instant buddies, mostly based on both their vast sports knowledge. When we all hang out Holli and I sit and may or may not talk while our husbands flip channels discussing the latest in high school, college, and professional sports with never a quiet moment between them. They are the friends we are always sad to leave. Holli may be the friend that is the most like me and I love her deeply. I really can't imagine what I'd do without her. Love you Hol and I hope you have the most fantastic of birthdays!!!

Tristan Tyler

2009-07-07T16:56:00.000-07:00

This post is dedicated to one of my best friends in honor of his birthday...TRISTAN TYLER SHUTT. Some of my best friends from college are boys. In fact, two of them were bridesmaids or bridesmen as we called them in my wedding. Tristan is one of those. Yesterday was his birthday and I wanted to dedicate a blog to him and our one of a kind friendship. Tristan is one of my very favorite people. When he calls or texts me even for silly things, it makes me smile. We have always been able to talk about ANYTHING and for hours at a time. I have so many wonderful memories of Tris. One of my first memories was made due to our German class. It was the first of many classes we had together and for an extra credit project or something we had to go to a German dinner at our professor's house. When I got into the car he asked me if I liked fish. I said not really and was worried that was what we were going to eat. He meant the band, not the food. And from then on it was history. My Junior year, his senior he wrote a continuous rap for me during different classes we both were taking. In true Tris style it was funny and creative and sentimental. After class he would read them to me as we walked to the GC or back to one of our cars. The last rap was so sweet and personal. One of my favortie memories. I saw dances that were reserved only for me. We both kept secrets and used each other's homework as our own at times. We talked all through the night. We studied with scheduled massage breaks. We drove around Shawnee with the windows down snapping along to some music I never knew who was singing. We ate from the GC on money our parents meant to carry us through semesters. We laughed and told stories. We drempt together, cried together, and mostly laughed together. I still treasure the moments we get to spend together. They are fewer and further between now, but all the more precious. I love him like a brother. I'm so proud of all his accomplishments and I admire his incredible creativity. He is a true catch and I think very highly of him. I count myself blessed to be his friend. I love that I can call him on stupid things he does and that he does the same for me. We are totally ourselves with each other. He may be my only guy friend that didn't let my marriage affact our friendship and I love that. He is a kindered spirit. He's sentimental and loves to remember when. If you ever get a chance to meet my friend Tristan soak him up because he is truly one of the most loving and kind people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Love you Tris!

Ode to my Middle Sister

2009-06-20T19:40:00.000-07:00

Today is my little sister, Cassie Raquel Meyer-Hays' birthday! She turned 25 today so I thought it was appropriate to dedicate a blog to my most faithful reader.
I don't have a SINGLE childhood memory without Cassie in it. I'm 17 months her senior and we have been each others consistent sidekick for as long as I can remember. One of my favorite memories as kids was after my parents would put us to bed Cassie would sneak into my room and say she was scared so she could sleep with me. We would inevitably end up laughing and my parents would threaten to separate us. She has always been my built in best friend! At times she was my shadow, at other's she was my slave. When Cassie started kindergarten our roles began to switch. She became the decisive one that lead out and I've slowly become the one who needs other opinions and cares too much about what other people think. Not my little sister! She is the MOST HONEST person I've ever been around, but in the best way possible. You always know where you stand with her and what she's thinking (even if you'd rather not) She is independent and business savy. When she sets her mind to something, it gets accomplished - no matter what. Her ability to mix the truth with humor is something I admire greatly. She is the picture of transparency and is totally comfortable in her own skin, despite any flaws, she makes no apologies for who she is. I'm so proud of her work ethic. She owns and operates two successful businesses. She is an amazing mother to my niece, Emrie. Who I see so much of Cassie in. Cassie is seriously one of the funniest people I know. No matter where we are, she makes me laugh. Sometimes a little too much! (Cracker Barrel, that's all I'm going to say) She wears her heart on her sleeve and shares the emotions of the moment with all those who'll listen. When she's excited about something, you're gonna hear about it. If she's mad or sad or frustrated - also gonna hear about it. She cries easily and often makes me laugh instead of shedding tears myself. A few choice words that remind her of her past and she's blubbering uncontrollably. I remember in middle school going to see Titanic and we had to wait long after the movie was over for Cassie to get herself together before we could leave. She feels so deeply, so quickly and easily. She is a bit of a shopaholic and loves a good find. She isn't too proud to admit the price and when we were younger all presents were purchased off of clearance racks regardless of the combo of items. It could be socks, a checkbook cover and pj pants all from Old Navy, all under $5 each (seriously one of my Christmas gifts) We (my mom, 2 sisters, and myself) are all very protective of each other. When my parents divorced we bonded together in a way I still can't really explain and because we love each other so fiercely it's hard for us not to react quickly when we feel the other is in trouble. I love my little sister and I'm so proud of the women she has become. She is all you could want in a best friend and I'm lucky to have her as mine.
I love you Cass and I hope you've had a wonderful day! Thank you for being someone I can look up to and for always, always being my little sister! As the days and years pass I'm more thankful with each passing one that I have you and Chelsie as my sisters. I couldn't imagine sharing all those memories with anyone but you!

Super Summer

2009-06-15T10:38:00.000-07:00

We went to Super Summer last week and it's been a long time since I've felt so refreshed and learned so many new things about God and we go to a lot of camps, retreats, revivals etc... The thing that I love about Super Summer, and have since I went as a student, is that as soon as you step foot off the van you can feel God's presence. We arrived for Team Leader weekend and soon after were each given two five pound ankle weights to wear until Sunday night. (approx. 36 hours) This may not sound like much but the lessons I learned in those few hours were plentiful and painful. We were not to take them off but to carry these "burdens" like we do our sins. Some people said as time went on they noticed them less and less, I was opposite. Mine started rubbing blisters on my ankles and made walking without a limp continually more difficult. My sweet hubs offered to bear my burdens for me, but my stubborn self didn't want to admit I needed help so I kept them. As Sunday night approached I grew more and more anxious to get them taken off. The Consecration Service was so powerful. My husband prayed over me and removed my burdens, which mainly consisted of not being able to have a baby, and God reaffirmed to me that His timing is perfect and I can only do so much in this process, the rest is up to Him. That visual reminder of removing the weights has helped me to continually lay that burden down. I also had the honor of praying over several team leaders and remove their burdens. I was especially humbled to pray for one of my girls, Samantha Olson. She has had a rough go of things for quite sometime. I've been praying for her for years. God has recently gotten a hold of her life and she is learning so much and growing like crazy. Praying over her was extremely emotional, but also extremely amazing experience. I knew God had great things in store for the week with a beginning like that.
This was FBC Sayre's first trip to Super Summer and we were anxious to see what our students thought and what God would show them. He didn't disappoint. They all had great weeks and are so excited after experiencing a dose of the power of Christ. One night the recent graduates (Silver School) prayed over the almost 8th graders (Red School) and that was such a beautiful site. Watching these kids who are leaving home and their respective student ministries bless, advise, and pray for the ones who are just starting that journey was like nothing I've ever seen. Such a blessing! We worked with Red School, which I was REALLY nervous about because I'm most comfortable with high schoolers, but they were so fun! I loved Red School and I have now been in every color, either as a student, a Team Leader, or as a Team Leader Coordinator. Many other things I could say, but we were all blessed by spending a week with like minded believers asking the Spirit of God to fall. He did and we will never be the same. True fellowship with God happens when we change after our encounter. That is my prayer for our 10 students as well as all others who attended Super Summer '09!

Pre-Partum Depression

2009-05-15T21:43:00.000-07:00

I've shared on my blog before that we've been trying to get pregnant for some time now. That time is two years. Two years ago this month was the first time we stopped birth control and I'll never forget how I thought it would work. I thought that first month would be the ticket to a baby. I'll also never forget how I felt when I started again after that first month free from birth control. We were in Nashville on vacation with some friends and I went in our room and cried for a minute or two with Chris holding me telling me these things take time. How little we realized the truth of that statement. Well with the time that this process is taking I've seen God's hand and I know He has a reason and a purpose for having us wait and I've built a wall that I just don't let myself go to the place that I believe I could be pregnant. It's too big of a disappointment when I'm not. This week, however, I let my guard down and have really let myself think about being pregnant and relishing in the possibilities. This isn't healthy and I know that, but sometimes you just can't help it. Now if/when I'm not, I know the hurt will be huge, something that I don't want to face...again. I told Chris tonight, "I'm just ready for this part to be over." And I really am. It seems like it will never happen for us and it has happened so easily for so many others. It's hard not to be frustrated and not to question. All day I've just been telling myself to Trust the Lord and lean not on my own understanding. But that's not hard sometimes.

Not so good

2009-05-10T13:46:00.001-07:00

So it turns out I may not be a very good blogger. It's been over a month since I've written anything. It's not that I haven't had time or nothing blog-worthy has happened or even that I haven't been reading all of your blogs regularly, I don't know what it is. There is something a bit daunting to me about writing about things I think are mundane or just silly. And I'm awful at taking pictures to blog about. I'm going to one someday on my paper route because believe me there are some sites worth seeing in Western Oklahoma on Tuesday afternoons. Everything from water fountains made from old, rusty slides to hand written signs that are kinda funny, but mostly unfortunate.
Summer is just around the corner and that equals BUSY for the Gordon's. We have a jammed pack few months, but we're both really excited. To a youth minister summer is the biggest part of your year and you get to spend the most time with your students. We both feel a great anticipation of what this one will hold for our ministry and for the students of Sayre. It's a really exciting feeling, like the floodgates are about to open.
My step-dad, Gary, was diagnosed with bladder cancer right after Spring Break. He is going to MD Anderson in Houston on Tuesday to begin pre-op testing and will have his bladder and prostate removed May 19th. This may sound bad or like I'm a jerk, but I really don't know how to feel about the whole situation because he's not my dad but he's more then just the average person you hear about having cancer. It's been difficult for me to figure our how to process the whole situation. I know I'm sad for my mom and that Gary has to face such a rough time, and for his kids who he hasn't always been on good terms with, and especially his grandkids who he is a big part of their lives - but I don't know how I feel for me. Does that make sense? I'm heading to Houston at the end of the month to help my mom when he is released from the hospital. Just to run errands or help any other way she needs me. Say a prayer for Gary and the doctors next week. I think the weight of the situation is setting in and he's naturally getting a little nervous.
Chelsie, my baby sister, is graduating from high school in two weeks. It boggles my mind. I'm eight years older then her and she's always been a baby in my eyes. She was 10 when I graduated from high school so it just doesn't seem possible that she should be at this huge transition in her life. She's a great kid with a good head on her shoulders. She is confident in herself and afraid to fight for what she wants. I know she'll be great in whatever the future holds for her and I'm so excited to see what comes next in her life. She's going to OSU in the fall and Europe this summer. I can't believe she's so grown up. I'm extremely proud of who she is and who she is becoming!
Friday night I had a great dinner with my high school friends. We get together semi-regularly and just laugh and catch up. I feel so fortunate to have a group of friends that come from a similar background and we can relate on so many levels. We have an outlet where nothing and I mean NOTHING is off of the table. It's a true blessing to have people know you that intimately and love you all the more for it. I think it's a rare gift to have so many people that I could call on day or night that would bend over backwards to be there for me.
And in honor of Mother's Day: one of my favorite memories of my mom and my best friend... She had go out of her way to be creative on the limited budget of a single mom of three to give us what we needed/wanted. I remember one time she and I were in Norman shopping and It was just the two of us and when it was time for dinner we didn't just go to a drive-thru, mom and I went to a grocery store. We bought a roasted chicken, a bottle of seltzer water (which we didn't realize wasn't plain water until it was too late) and a small bag of chips to share to save some money. We had a little picnic in the mall parking lot and we laughed as we used extra napkins from the glove box to wipe the chicken grease off of our fingers. We did have to go buy a drink because our water was gross! I think we may have left the bones in the parking lot but I don't remember why. I know a lot of people think they have a great mom and I am one of those lucky ones. She has taught me how to be independent and trustworthy, honest, loyal, have a good sense of humor and how to handle difficult situations with grace, how to cook, clean,and to be organized. She is a beautiful picture of sacrificial love and has always, will always put her children above all else. I love you mom and hope that one day I get to love my babies as much as you've loved me. You are beautiful and graceful and selfless.

Party Time!!!

2009-04-02T21:52:00.000-07:00

ONE WEEK LEFT TO OREDR! The party will close next Friday, April 17th!
I'm hosting an online party for a friend of mines new business. It's really cute stuff and I thought this idea was much easier then hosting an actual party. I know I'd be more interested in doing it this way. Anyway shop and order away! I think there's a box you have to unclick to send it to your house instead of mine but you're smart people and can figure that out. These make great gifts from graduates or for Mother's Day.Hope you all find fun new bags! Click here and let the shopping begin!!!
www.mythirtyone.com/crystallockler then click on "shop from a party" on the right side of your screen and click on my name.

Song related memories

2009-03-25T19:31:00.000-07:00

Monday I went to Purcell to spend the day with my mom because it was her 50th Birthday. While I was at her house I found a whole bunch of old cd's, some of which I mixed in high school and college. As I got on the road to make the nearly 3 hour drive back to Sayre I popped them in and was taken back to fun days and memories with so many different people. I want to post some of them that people who read this blog will hopefully appreciate them as well...Hope these make some of you smile!
ZOMBIE - Kinsey Henson Charles. Driving down the road singing this as loud as possible and laughing all the way. I think we were in your white bug.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS - Leslie Horn, now Poe and Christina Porter Chartney. Sophomore year. First semester finals week. 2 am. I was sleeping and was woken up by them singing this song, dancing, tensil and little else. So fun!
MEET VIRGINIA - Becca Harris. Reasons related to Mondays...
DISNEY MUSIC, SPECIFICALLY FROM THE LITTLE MERMAID - Taylor 2nd West girls, Monday nights, good times!
DOES HE LOVE YOU/HOOKED ON A FEELIN'/ PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN- Cassie Raquel. So many wonderful songs I could list as memories with my little sisters. Many a fun time!
AIN'T NO MOUNTAIN HIGH - Mackenzie Martin. If we sung this song once, we sung it a million times!
SNAPS -Tristan Tyler Shutt. I don't know the real name of this song, but it's wonderful memories none the less. We are kindred spirits who are equally sentimental and I love him!
MAYBERRY - Luke Whorton. It's the song that made him like country music. Lots of great memories with him from college.

Seasons

2009-03-17T15:22:00.000-07:00

I run a paper route every Tuesday afternoon. I go through several rural towns surrounding Sayre and it's usually very boring. There's not much to look at and since it's winter everything is dead, but slowly things are turning green. I love it! I love to watch the progression of nature. It started with green wheat pastures here and there. Now the trees are starting to bud and turn green and even some of the grass is beginning to turn a yellow-ish green color. I love it when the weather starts getting warm and everywhere you look things are turning colors.
Because of a visual reminder of seasons changing, I'm reminded of how there is a time for everything. Our family has recently received several rounds of bad medical news and today as I drove through the short grass lands of Western Oklahoma, I was reminded that for everything there is a time and a season. All the bad news that seems to be coming from every direction has a purpose and a lesson. This too has it's purpose and God's hand is in it. Even though it's hard to understand, winter is necessary, rough times are necessary. Even though things aren't always easy and aren't always how we'd have them to be, the trials in our lives have a purpose.
I needed the reminder after a couple of weeks of rough news. Bring on SPRING and focus on the beauty of the world around us. For everything there is a time and a season. A purpose. A desired end result.

Blog problems

2009-03-11T19:37:00.000-07:00

So I finally got a cute blog and now I don't know how to get rid of the ugly background to where I'm typing and where my followers, bio, etc... I need help! How do I fix this?

Commitment

2009-03-07T12:54:00.000-08:00

We went to our churches couples retreat this weekend and though we didn't learn anything life changing. I was reminded of what was said to us on our wedding day. Our pastor talked about love, of course, but he also talked about how we were making a covenant. And what that meant, a covenant is an agreement between two people and God. It's a bigger deal then just two people deciding to hang out and live together and do life together. It means giving it all you can and putting each other above all others. I remember him saying that there are days when you love your spouse and it's easy to be married and be together. But there are other days when it's not so easy. When you don't really want to be married or love each other or consider him above yourself and those are the days the commitment comes into play. You have to be committed. So many couples that emphasize how they "feel" but feelings change. They are always changing, through good times and bad, crisis and smooth sailing, plenty and in want, all kinds of things affect how we feel. So we all make conscience choices all along the way that are in the best interest of our marriages. It's so important for couples to continue to work on your marriage and be committed to each other.
We live in a very non-committal society. I'm as guilty as anyone else. Everyone waits until the last minute to commit even to small things. We see an out clause in everything. We sometimes even build them in. It's so important to intentionally make the mental switch with our marriages. When Chris and I were dating I explained to him that to me marriage is a one time thing. I lived through and saw my parents heartbreak when they got divorced and at 13 when they ended things I decided I would never, no matter what, get divorced. I think you have to have that mentality. Because people are fallen and we make wrong choices. If there's no commitment then marriage is just like anything else that you can change in and out of, why bother?
It was a good reminder for me to remember to choose my marriage and to choose to make it a priority, so I thought I'd share it in case any of you might need to be encouraged.

Encouragement

2009-03-04T14:15:00.000-08:00

This week has been on encouraging thing after another in all different areas of my life.
Last Friday my editor at the newspaper I work for handed me a story that she wanted to be the lead for this week's edition of the Sayre Record. I was excited about also really intimidated, not because this is a super huge deal, but more because she was trusting me with this and I wanted to do a good job. Well the paper came out yesterday and several people have complimented me on the story today. One man even made a special trip to our office to tell how much he appreciated it. There's a certain blessing when others notice your hard work. I don't think the story being good has too much to do with me, the content was what was fantastic. In a nut shell a first grader saved her home because she asked her mom about the batteries in their smoke detechors last fall and then last week they went off in the middle of the night warning the family to get out. Very easy to write a story when you get to hear about a sweet little girl who paid attention when the firemen came to school!
Another huge encouragement has been: Chris and I have been trying to get pregnant for almost two years. We have recently started having doctors appointments to see what is impeading our progrss. People, especially, at our new church have been so faithful to pray for us and to tell they are. It's overwhelming to have people who haven't known you very long to so earnestly lift you up as you face something that's as big as becoming parents. It's been a struggle to say the least, but we know God's timing is perfect, not my planning. I have to remind myself of that often.
We have lived in Sayre for just over 4 months. We got here as basketball season began and we went to almost every game this season. It was a frustrating thing to me sometimes because I didn't see any fruit. The kids didn't seem to notice we were there and despite a few awkward "good games" we seemed to go nearly unnoticed. Last week basketball season ended. And Sunday one of the girls who used to go to our church, but doesn't anymore decided to stop by our house. And a relationship is developing rapidly. It's so refreshing that because she saw us at her games, she felt like she could see what she thought of us. She also came over last night for dinner, unexpectidly and brought another girl who is in the same boat as she is. It's wonderful and I'm so excited. All those nights in a gym weren't unnoiticed!
Also under that same banner...I don't think I've ever been a part of a church I love as much as this one. The vision, leadership, and heartbeat all line up with my passions. The road we took here was so crazy, but I never expected what awaited us at FBC Sayre. It's so refreshing to be apart of a family and to go and not feel like it was just another duty of my week as the "Youth Ministers Wife."
Lastly, I'm encouraged by my husband. He tries so hard to help out and this week he's been great to make an effort. I'm so blessed to have someone love me as much as he does and to put up with all my crazy. He has been so great and tried so hard to understand why not getting pregant is hard for me. He's so supportive and wants to carry all of my burdens for me. I'm a lucky girl to have married so well. He's definately a keeper.
This weekend we're going to our churches couples retreat. We've never to anything like this, but I'm looking forward to it. (This isn't typical of my feelings on non-youth church outings) I guess if nothing else we get to stay in a nice hotel and get to know others in our church.

New things & D.I.Y

2009-02-19T16:49:00.001-08:00

I love getting new decor for my house. It's hard for me to commit to big purchases, but once I do, it's because I've fallen in love with those items so completely. I received one such purchase in the mail from Pottery Barn yesterday. We got a new quilt. Chris told me in May, when we moved to Lubbock, that I could get a new one of MY choice. This was a big deal for several reasons. First, because our first fight EVER was over bedding and it was the hardest thing to choose when we got married. We couldn't find anything we both liked. It was forever trying to find something we could agree on. We finally did but I just settled on something. So the hunt began and almost 9 months later I committed. Anyways, all of that to say my new quilt came yesterday and I LOVE IT!!!

Another hobby, I guess you could say, is painting and re-painting various rooms. It's the cheapest way to make the biggest affect on your home. $30 for a totally new look and feel and that's for the good paint. I'm not at all afraid of color and it's evident in our house. We chose this smokey blue-ish purple to go with our new quilt. So hopefully we'll get the DIY done this weekend and I'll post pictures of our new bedroom next week.

Get to Know the Gordon's

2009-02-15T08:16:00.000-08:00

So I was going to post this yesterday in honor of Valentine's Day, but I couldn't get it to work on our Mac. Here is a little something to get to know the Gordon's.

What are your middle names? Gene after his mom's mom who died while she was pregnant with Chris and my middle name is McKenzie. My first name is Danna, a combo of both my parents first names.

How long have you been together? Since November 16, 2005.

How long did you know each other before you started dating? We initially met at Super Summer in 2002. He was a School Coordinator and I was a TL who just finished her freshmen year at OBU. He supposedly told the other guys that I would make a good youth ministers wife that week but nothing came of it. We reconnected after I graduated and was working at the BGCO for youth ministers. We chatted at a youth ministers conference and later that week he tracked me down at work and we talked all night. The next night we hung out till the wee hours again. I'd say we were both pretty sold at that point.

Who asked who out? He definately asked me out. I had no idea he was interested in me as anything more then a friend. I've always been the best friend and so I was clueless.

How old were each of you when you met? I was 19 so that means he would have been 24

How old are each of you now? I am 26. He is 31.

How long did you date before becoming engaged? three months to the day. That day just so happens to be the third anniversary of that wonderful day!

How tall are each of you? I am 5'4" and he is 5'10"

Whose siblings do you see the most? Probably mine. My sisters are my best friends so I always wanna see them. We have gotten to see Delton more lately because we all live in Oklahoma again. Still far, but better then different states.

Do you have any children together? Not yet! We've been working on that.

What about pets? We have one little ball of energy...Thatcher, he's a maltipoo and we've had him since Halloween 08. He likes Chris better, but he's fun to have around.

Did you go to the same school? No. Our college experiences look a lot different. I went all four years in a row at OBU. Chris took a different road...he started at SWOSU in Sayre for two years and then moved to Stillwater and went two years there, and then quit 8 hours shy of graduating. He returned to finish his degree at USAO in 2007. He graduated last April. A huge accomplishment! I'm so proud of him!!

Are you from the same hometown? No he's a Sayre native and I'm from the Heart of Oklahoma, Purcell

Who is the smartest? Christopher! His mind keeps track of all kinds of crazy things.

Who is the most sensitive? It's a tie. I'm definately more emotional and get my feelings hurt more easily. But he has his moments too.

Where do you eat out most as a couple? well with all of Sayre's 4 choices...lately it's been the new place in town, Miller's Cafe.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple? Kona, Hawaii. For our honeymoon. Hands down the best vacation I've ever, we've ever been on! Beautiful, relaxing, amazing!

Who does the cooking? I do. Chris grills out, but I'm anal and don't like other people in my kitchen. Hateful I know.

Who is more social? CHRIS! I'm a little socially awkward with new people. Old friends, I'm great with. Love them, but I don't think I'm very good at making new friends, my age especially.

Who is the neat-freak? me for sure.

Who hogs the bed? we would both say the other one does, but probably me. I get cold and so I scoot over closer to him and sometimes don't go back to my side.

Who wakes up earlier? Depends on the day and who has to work first. Probably equal toss up.

Who has the bigger family?I do mostly because of re-marriage, but I do have one more sibling then he does.

How do you spend the holidays? Christmas day is always with my mom and sisters, and the rest of the time we spend them running from one house to another. We had 12 Christmas celebrations last year.

Who is more jealous? Probably me. But it's mostly just of how we spend our time. I'm more of a home body and he's a mover and a shaker.

Do you have little pet names for each other? He calls me Babe most of the time and I make lots of variations of his name. Chris, Christopher, Toph, Tophy, C Double G. etc...

How long did it take to get serious? About five minutes I think. No seriously, we said the L word at 6 weeks.

Who eats more? depends on what we're eating. He does for the most part but I eat more snacks.

Who sings better? Toph again wins this one. He has a beautiful voice and I love to sing with him.

Who’s older? My cradle robbing husband, by 5 years, 3 months, and 1 day.

Who does the dishes? Usually me. It's the anal thing again. I have a specific way to load the dishwasher. He helps sometimes.

Who snores? I guess this is an ok one to give to the other half. He's the noisy one.

Who’s better with the computer? He is. He's really good with techy things.

Who drives? When we're together, he usually does. I have been driving more lately though.

Who kissed who first? He kissed me on my forehead the first night we hung out and he also moved in for the lipper.

Who eats more sweets? Definately me, unless it's one of his favorites.

First time for everything

2009-02-07T21:11:00.000-08:00

I've been stocking other peoples blogs for sometime now, not in a weird way, I just like reading what's going on in the lives of my friends. So I'm finally joining the blog world.

We have been busy these days. Today we had Chris' dad's wedding. It was a long day but it went well. I think they were happy with how things turned out so I guess we were too. Chris officiated the ceremony and I coordinated it. It makes for a long, but good day.

Tomorrow after Sunday School I'm heading to Oklahoma City to go to the Affair of the Heart with Cassie and Emrie. I'm excited to see them and to see what if I can find some cute new things for our house. I still haven't gotten our new house totally decorated. I have a hard time making decisions and Chris and I have a hard time trying to find time to hang things once I do make up my mind. We still have three bedrooms with nothing on the walls. Someday I guess...

This week I'm working at the paper, going to a basketball game Tuesday night, going to Ok City Thursday and Friday for a writing conference with Chris, and back to Sayre for a girls event Saturday, and back to Purcell/Norman Sunday and Monday. Another crazy week! Here we go!