I had the extreme and rare privilege to grow up as a third generation friend. My first friends from childhood were the parents of my mom's first friends who were the parents of my Papa Bill's first friends. The common ground we all shared was a church out on a hill smack in the middle of several small towns that all of our Great Grandparents were charter members of. Because of the deep history we all inherited and we saw each other every Sunday and Wednesday our entire lives these people have always had a piece of my heart. Their parents are a little like mine too, as are their grandparents. In fact, they all called my grandpa "Papa" too, I guess because that's what we called him in our 2-3 year old Sunday School class. We may not have spent holidays together, except New Years Eve, or been related by blood, but in nearly every early memory or picture from my childhood one or more of these friends are there.
Our parents grew up going on family vacations together and were each others first kisses, best friends and groomsmen. When they were our age they took vacations together and left all of us kids with our grandparents. They all had babies at the same time and made sure we all grew up in church together. All of our moms took turns teaching us in Sunday School and VBS.
We all played hide and seek during choir practice and ran down the halls of our church while our parents weren't looking. We would scoot our Sunday shoes along the bright orange carpet of the sanctuary collecting static electricity to shock each other with. We went to church camp and youth group ski trips together every year. I have more memories then I can count surrounded by the Christian and Huddleston kids.
And sadly, we are the last generation to experience this kind of friendship. Since those days at Union Hill we've all moved off, got married and had babies of our own who don't know the Christian's or the Huddleston's. Our kids won't grow up singing in church Christmas pageants together or teasing each other through their awkward teenage years. And I know they are missing out on a huge blessing.
This weekend Mildred Christian, their grandmother, had a massive stroke that caused irreversible, tremendous brain damage. Their family gathered yesterday at a hospital in Oklahoma City and sang together as they unplugged the life support that was keeping her stable. A fitting tribute to a lady who made their WHOLE family sing at church lots of times and usually in rounds of good old Southern Baptist church songs. Her organs are still functioning and she is clinging to life, but it's just a matter of time. There is nothing the doctors can do.
I was never especially close to Miss. Mildred, or Me-Maw as they called her, but my heart is breaking along with theirs because of the deep, generational friendships I was blessed to be born into. When I think back through my childhood I can see Mildred in the background at nearly every turn. As I grew up beside her grandchildren she witnessed to me through her steadfast service and consistancy. I knew she loved her grandkids and I felt a little included under that umbrella. I can't remember a single Sunday of my nearly thirty years of life that I didn't hear her high soprano voice rise above the rest of the choir's during church at Union Hill. In fact, my mom still loves to tell the story of how Mildred fed me my first solid food in the nursery one Sunday. She's still a little bitter she didn't get that first cracker in a picture.
She was a special part of a very special family and now she is gone. In the blink of an eye. She was fine on Friday and spent it with one of her great grandkids, just how she would've chosen her last day on earth probably.
I don't know why this has shaken my so much. Maybe it's because I know it could be our family soon and I dread that day so much. Or maybe its just hard to see those we love hurt. But either way its hard to see my grandparents generation of friends slowly disappear. I'm thankful for the role that Mildred played in my life and for the place she has in my heart. May the Lord be gracious to her and welcome her into Glory soon.
I'm so thankful for the faces and friendships of those who filled my days growing up. I can't imagine it any other way.
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Happy 100th!
 |
| Chris' family. His Aunts, brother, and cousins. |
Thursday, October 4, 2012
T-Shirts
I'm turning in our first order for our super-cool, uber-soft adoption T-Shirts. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't leaving anyone out... Let me know if you'd like to be added to the list ASAP. They're only $15 and you can conveniently pay for them via the fun instructions to your right or you can mail us a check. They come in kids and adult sizes through 3 Extra Large. Feel free to ask any questions you may have or send everyone you know through this blog to buy one for themselves. Ha! Christmas is just around the corner, after all! Thanks for all your support friends!!!
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Endurance
Yesterday I attended my first run. We volunteered for the Orphan Mud Run in Ada as a benefitting family. Some sweet families who have also adopted before put the event together as a blessing to families who are fundraising. We had little to do with the preparations for this event which was wonderful!
We have been working really hard this past month planning and coordinating fundraisers so just get to show up and help was wonderful. My job was really simple. I was to stand in front of the last of 11 obstacles on a 5K muddy trail and instruct the runners what do to. There was a steep incline right before they reached me and were ending the race on the other side of a large puddle. I found myself getting teary eyed many times as faces flushed with exhaustion and caked with mud topped the hill and finished their race.
I have never seen the point of these runs or races. They require a lot of commitment, work and training. Frankly, they're just unappealing to someone who is over weight, lazy and generally unathletic. I have never excelled at these sort of things and so I think sometime in high school I gave up at all athletic endeavors. But as I stood and welcomed runners to the end of their race I think I understood more of the appeal. It was a hard run with lots of hills and those who crossed the line last you could tell there was struggle involved to make their bodies keep going. I can relate. Sometimes its hard to want to keep going. To finish. But the end result the accomplishment is worth the sacrifices.
With the increased financial responsibility of adopting two babies instead of one four months apart I must admit that I feel overwhelmed. The lack of plan makes me uncomfortable. We have no choice but to trust God's provision. There is no logical way our family can come up with the funds for the second adoption. No way. We will spend $10,000 less on these two babies then Chris makes in an entire year. It doesn't add up. I have worked as hard as I can at these fundraisers the last several weeks and we've done well. Great actually. But Bennett's arrival will cause all of these activities to cease and a new baby will take over my days until our third Gordon makes their appearance. But I want to finish this journey were on with faith in my eyes. I want to trust without question God's provision and plan for our family. This doesn't surprise Him. He sees the end result. I have to trust.
In the end the money is secondary to all in our lives that is to come. I hate that its even part of this process, but its evident that my trust in God's provision is a part of the lessons adoptions #2 and #3 hold. I am choosing to endure with cheerfulness as we continue down this road. My adoption verse comes back in to play once again, but with a different meaning. "To Him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all we ask, think or imagine. To Him be the honor and glory forever and ever. Amen" Eph. 3.20
Thank you to all of you who have given, participated, helped, prayed and encouraged us to this point. It truly takes a village to raise children and in our case to bring them home. Thank you seems insufficient to the gratitude my heart holds for our tribe. I'm partial to those who make it up, but I think it's the best one around.
We have been working really hard this past month planning and coordinating fundraisers so just get to show up and help was wonderful. My job was really simple. I was to stand in front of the last of 11 obstacles on a 5K muddy trail and instruct the runners what do to. There was a steep incline right before they reached me and were ending the race on the other side of a large puddle. I found myself getting teary eyed many times as faces flushed with exhaustion and caked with mud topped the hill and finished their race.
I have never seen the point of these runs or races. They require a lot of commitment, work and training. Frankly, they're just unappealing to someone who is over weight, lazy and generally unathletic. I have never excelled at these sort of things and so I think sometime in high school I gave up at all athletic endeavors. But as I stood and welcomed runners to the end of their race I think I understood more of the appeal. It was a hard run with lots of hills and those who crossed the line last you could tell there was struggle involved to make their bodies keep going. I can relate. Sometimes its hard to want to keep going. To finish. But the end result the accomplishment is worth the sacrifices.
With the increased financial responsibility of adopting two babies instead of one four months apart I must admit that I feel overwhelmed. The lack of plan makes me uncomfortable. We have no choice but to trust God's provision. There is no logical way our family can come up with the funds for the second adoption. No way. We will spend $10,000 less on these two babies then Chris makes in an entire year. It doesn't add up. I have worked as hard as I can at these fundraisers the last several weeks and we've done well. Great actually. But Bennett's arrival will cause all of these activities to cease and a new baby will take over my days until our third Gordon makes their appearance. But I want to finish this journey were on with faith in my eyes. I want to trust without question God's provision and plan for our family. This doesn't surprise Him. He sees the end result. I have to trust.
In the end the money is secondary to all in our lives that is to come. I hate that its even part of this process, but its evident that my trust in God's provision is a part of the lessons adoptions #2 and #3 hold. I am choosing to endure with cheerfulness as we continue down this road. My adoption verse comes back in to play once again, but with a different meaning. "To Him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all we ask, think or imagine. To Him be the honor and glory forever and ever. Amen" Eph. 3.20
Thank you to all of you who have given, participated, helped, prayed and encouraged us to this point. It truly takes a village to raise children and in our case to bring them home. Thank you seems insufficient to the gratitude my heart holds for our tribe. I'm partial to those who make it up, but I think it's the best one around.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Exceedingly, Abundantly
Once upon a time that seems so very long ago there was a girl who wished for a baby. She and her husband tried and tried to get one the only way they knew how for years, but all their effort was to no avail. Then one day after lots of struggling they surrendered their plan and waited for God's. He quickly answered their cries with a beautiful, brown baby boy who they fell madly in love with. They named him Tucker and he continues to be the light of their life.
Fast forward about two and a half years... There was another baby promised to this family by another birth mother who lived in a far away land called Texas. As they were getting everything ready for their second prince to arrive the birth mom of the eldest prince called. She is pregnant again and asked the family if they would consider adding another baby to their quiver. Without a moments hesitation the family gladly said yes. It seemed like it was their only choice.
As the days passed, they began spreading the news that they would be adopting, not one baby but TWO!!! The young babies will be just over three months apart (if both Birth Mom's deliver on their due dates) and the family will grow from three to five in just a few months!
They know this is a little crazy and quite unorthodox, but the family feels so blessed! They couldn't be happier for the next steps in their adventure of babies.
And they lived happily ever after... (With lots of prayers, support and wisdom from sweet friends and family!)
That's the short story.
The more detailed version goes like this...
We have an open relationship with Tucker's Birth Mom, K. We see her 3-4 times a year and though the relationship has not been without drama it has always been a good one. We are so happy to get to be a part of her life and that Tucker will get to grow up knowing who she is and being able to ask her questions later. Such a blessing.
K's life is about as different from ours as possible. She bounces around between friends houses and jobs. She is single (most of the time) and just doesn't have much. She was a foster child who out grew the system so she doesn't have any support from a family. She depends on the generosity of friends to live.
We found out she was pregnant when she posted it on Facebook early this summer. We immediately began praying. I talked with her not long after her news made it's internet debut and she was pretty adamant that she wanted to parent this third child. (well fourth including the one she miscarried last summer that we were also planning to adopt) We kept praying and moved forward with our adoption plans. We just didn't feel like we should plan our family around her. Our profile was activated on July 26th after our Zambia trip fell through. We were chosen by a birth mom in Texas, J, on August 10th, 2012. K knew all about this other plan and last we talked she was still going to parent.
Then last Monday, September 10th, she called. We talked for a long time and she asked us if there was anyway we would consider adopting the baby she is carrying. I immediately said yes. Chris and I have been praying for the whole year that the baby (-ies) that are supposed to be ours, ultimately would be. Regardless of our plans and we felt like K's question was our answer.
After we talked she called our adoption agency in Oklahoma City and visited with the Director there who was her case worker for Tucker. They set up an appointment for last Thursday, the 13th, to meet and talk things through. The counseling aspect is one of the MANY things we love about Deaconess! We had already been planning to go to Lawton to visit K this Friday, the 14th. After K's conversation Thursday with Holly from DPAS and our conversations with her Friday, she is 100% sure that she wants to place this baby in our family in February 2013!
Friday we went down as planned and I got to go to her doctors appointment with her Friday morning. We got to see the baby and everything looks great! She is 19 weeks along and is due February 6th, 2013. We are so so excited and just flat OVERWHELMED!!! Two babies three months apart! Three babies under three years old!
We also know that February is a long time away and much could change. Much could also change before Bennett's arrival. He is due October 21st, but we are just believing that God has a better plan then we could come up with. We are trusting Him to help these Birth Mom's to decide what is best for these babies.
We know it's a lot! We know it might be a little crazy, but we also don't feel like there is any other decision. This baby is Tucker's half sibling and K is part of our family. This baby was already our family. We have been praying for protection over this child since we knew it existed and we have been praying for wisdom for K all the while. We believe this is God's provision for our growing family.
This is also a GIANT undertaking. We are very close to having adoption #1 paid for, but that leaves nothing to pay for adoption #2. Please pray the money will be provided and write or email your congressmen and ask him to vote to make the adoption tax credit fully refundable for 2012. As of right now, that is the only way we know of that this thing will be funded that quickly. Also pray for both of these sweet Birth Moms who are trusting us with this huge honor and blessing! Pray for their health as well as our babies. Pray for peace, joy, comfort, wisdom, grace and encouragement as they walk through very difficult days. And pray for our family as we grow so quickly. Pray for smooth adjustments for all three of us and wisdom as we move forward in this huge walk of faith. Also pray we get the opportunity to show K and J what the love of Jesus really looks like and for their salvation. We want to bring God glory through all of this!
As far as Bennett is concerned, he is doing GREAT! J's blood pressure is staying low and things are still looking good. It looks like she will carry Bennett longer then she did her last baby who was four weeks early. (four weeks early is one week from today!) As of right now, this second baby hasn't affected this adoption and we're praying it won't. The count down is definitely on for Bennett to make his grand entrance!
So there is a little update on what we've been doing this past week. Big changes!
Fast forward about two and a half years... There was another baby promised to this family by another birth mother who lived in a far away land called Texas. As they were getting everything ready for their second prince to arrive the birth mom of the eldest prince called. She is pregnant again and asked the family if they would consider adding another baby to their quiver. Without a moments hesitation the family gladly said yes. It seemed like it was their only choice.
As the days passed, they began spreading the news that they would be adopting, not one baby but TWO!!! The young babies will be just over three months apart (if both Birth Mom's deliver on their due dates) and the family will grow from three to five in just a few months!
They know this is a little crazy and quite unorthodox, but the family feels so blessed! They couldn't be happier for the next steps in their adventure of babies.
And they lived happily ever after... (With lots of prayers, support and wisdom from sweet friends and family!)
That's the short story.
The more detailed version goes like this...
We have an open relationship with Tucker's Birth Mom, K. We see her 3-4 times a year and though the relationship has not been without drama it has always been a good one. We are so happy to get to be a part of her life and that Tucker will get to grow up knowing who she is and being able to ask her questions later. Such a blessing.
K's life is about as different from ours as possible. She bounces around between friends houses and jobs. She is single (most of the time) and just doesn't have much. She was a foster child who out grew the system so she doesn't have any support from a family. She depends on the generosity of friends to live.
We found out she was pregnant when she posted it on Facebook early this summer. We immediately began praying. I talked with her not long after her news made it's internet debut and she was pretty adamant that she wanted to parent this third child. (well fourth including the one she miscarried last summer that we were also planning to adopt) We kept praying and moved forward with our adoption plans. We just didn't feel like we should plan our family around her. Our profile was activated on July 26th after our Zambia trip fell through. We were chosen by a birth mom in Texas, J, on August 10th, 2012. K knew all about this other plan and last we talked she was still going to parent.
Then last Monday, September 10th, she called. We talked for a long time and she asked us if there was anyway we would consider adopting the baby she is carrying. I immediately said yes. Chris and I have been praying for the whole year that the baby (-ies) that are supposed to be ours, ultimately would be. Regardless of our plans and we felt like K's question was our answer.
After we talked she called our adoption agency in Oklahoma City and visited with the Director there who was her case worker for Tucker. They set up an appointment for last Thursday, the 13th, to meet and talk things through. The counseling aspect is one of the MANY things we love about Deaconess! We had already been planning to go to Lawton to visit K this Friday, the 14th. After K's conversation Thursday with Holly from DPAS and our conversations with her Friday, she is 100% sure that she wants to place this baby in our family in February 2013!
Friday we went down as planned and I got to go to her doctors appointment with her Friday morning. We got to see the baby and everything looks great! She is 19 weeks along and is due February 6th, 2013. We are so so excited and just flat OVERWHELMED!!! Two babies three months apart! Three babies under three years old!
We also know that February is a long time away and much could change. Much could also change before Bennett's arrival. He is due October 21st, but we are just believing that God has a better plan then we could come up with. We are trusting Him to help these Birth Mom's to decide what is best for these babies.
We know it's a lot! We know it might be a little crazy, but we also don't feel like there is any other decision. This baby is Tucker's half sibling and K is part of our family. This baby was already our family. We have been praying for protection over this child since we knew it existed and we have been praying for wisdom for K all the while. We believe this is God's provision for our growing family.
This is also a GIANT undertaking. We are very close to having adoption #1 paid for, but that leaves nothing to pay for adoption #2. Please pray the money will be provided and write or email your congressmen and ask him to vote to make the adoption tax credit fully refundable for 2012. As of right now, that is the only way we know of that this thing will be funded that quickly. Also pray for both of these sweet Birth Moms who are trusting us with this huge honor and blessing! Pray for their health as well as our babies. Pray for peace, joy, comfort, wisdom, grace and encouragement as they walk through very difficult days. And pray for our family as we grow so quickly. Pray for smooth adjustments for all three of us and wisdom as we move forward in this huge walk of faith. Also pray we get the opportunity to show K and J what the love of Jesus really looks like and for their salvation. We want to bring God glory through all of this!
As far as Bennett is concerned, he is doing GREAT! J's blood pressure is staying low and things are still looking good. It looks like she will carry Bennett longer then she did her last baby who was four weeks early. (four weeks early is one week from today!) As of right now, this second baby hasn't affected this adoption and we're praying it won't. The count down is definitely on for Bennett to make his grand entrance!
So there is a little update on what we've been doing this past week. Big changes!
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
31 Fun
The party is may be over, but your opportunity to do some shopping isn't. Take a few minutes to look through the 31 Catalog and see if you don't something you can't live without or maybe even get some early Christmas shopping out of the way. This stuff is awesome, durable, cute and makes great gifts! Here's the link www.mythirtyone.com/jamieduncan and remember all the proceeds from your purchase will go straight to helping us bring Bennett home.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
